A-WASSAILING

I think I got these songs mixed up...

I came A-Wassailing waffling in the snow,,
Ding dong,, ding dong,, ding-aling ding-aling,,
Christmas bells are ring-aling,,
Be of good Christmas cheer,, thru December my dear,,
It’s almost a stink-aling new year,,
Silver bells are ring-aling,, everybody is sing-aling,,
My nose and toes are icy ting-aling,,
I’ve got a hangover,, my head is ring-aling,,
The malls are teem-aling,, everybody is scream-aling,,
Parents at the mall with their little brats,,
Scarfs and mittens,, they forgot their hats,,
Get me this get me that,, pocket tokens are dwindle-aling,,
O,, naked babes I’d rather be dream-aling,,
O,, play that damn Tannenbaum,, it should be a crime,,
Would everybody stop that damn sing-aling…

Everybody is crazy,, Christmas is on a Tuesday,,
Hey fat Santa get off my roof,,
Your leaving reindeer poop,,
Rudolph with your nose so bright,,
You give me an awful fright,,
O,, what a delight,, its almost that Holy night,,
On the Holy night,, it will be really snow-aling,,
O,, JFC I’ll have to put up a tree,,
It will look all tinse-aling,,
Everybody is spend-aling,, everybody is spend-aling,,
O,, credit card O,, credit card,,
I’m dream-aling of a Florida Christmas,,
All I want for Christmas,, is for you to stop that sing-aling,,
Can’t wait till spring-aling is finally here,,
Would everybody stop that damn sing-aling…

Damn another red kettle ring-aling,,
Did you see that Santa with a nose ring-aling?...
Pass me the eggnog,, don’t care if I am a hog,,
Time to put on the Yule log,,
Red,, green,, and white Christmas lights,,
All strung about without a care,,
Hoping that St. Nick will trip somewhere,,
O,, God not ‘It’s a wonderful life’,,
Can’t I just go make jolly with my neighbor Holly,,
Silver bells and hot tub hotties,,
I want a naked hottie jolly new year,,
Would everybody stop that damn sing-aling…

A-Wassailing waffling in the snow,,
Chestnuts and mistletoe in the snare,,
Hoping that fat red suit Santa will soon be there,,
And in case you haven’t heard,,
Merry Christmas and you’re out of beer,,
There’s not a more congenial spot,,
For Christmas-aling-ever-after than,,
In Miami Florida,, ding-aling ding-aling,,
Would everybody stop that damn sing-aling…….

WELL,, THAT’S IT FOR THIS YEAR...
I HAVE TO GO OUT AND SLAY THE MINIONS AT THE MALL…
I’LL TRY TO DO BETTER IN 08…NO PROMISES THO…

TO “J”,, ONE LUMP OF COAL FOR YOU

TO “C”,, YOU SCARE ME,, IT’S TWO LUMPS FOR YOU

TO FENRIS,, PLOWING THRU THE OCEANS ICY WAVES…
KEEP WARM,, AND FOR G-DAMN SAKE KEEP
YOUR HEAD DOWN…

TO FAIRIE KAT,, HAVE A MERRY MERRY WICKED
WICCA X-MAS…

TO MUSE,, PLEASE KEEP MIA OUT OF THE TREE THIS YEAR…

TO DAN (WITH THE BIG HAT),, HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS,,
IS THAT PC CORRECT?...

TO BIONIC BOB,, YOU’RE A CRUSTY OLD FART,,
HAPPY NEW YEAR,, I’M SURE YOU STARTED ALREADY…

TO MARVIN,, YOUR VISA IS UP IN JANUARY,,
YOU’RE A NO NOSED MIDGET…

TO AUSTIN LT,, MAY YOU AND YOURS HAVE THE BEST
OF EVERYTHING IN O8…

TO CBB,, KEPT THE BURGERS COMING…

TO EVERYONE ELSE WHO HAS NEVER STOPPED BY,,
HAVE A MERRY FESTIVUS………