Something to ponder on as you wander on


Some liars are born that way, some are self-made; but the really great ones are elected to Congress…
--------------------------------------------------------------


Saturday, May 31, 2008

A TITANIC EVENT………

minf Gon språng diiikl nesmns ksdsds
yousd lsde skickas gått ut för sg
End dramat, rösta Obama…….

The next five days should be very interesting............

to Drowsey:
Hi ya Nanook type person,, my comment became kind
of long (surprise,, surprise,, surprise) so i put it here.....

The Sith queen isn’t going to be happy either…If
I were Obama and she doesn’t quit by the 3-4,, I’d
lay the hammer down on her,, no holds barred…He has
held back on attaching her on many issues and occasions…
And since its OK to attack Obama’s wife,, then it should be
OK to attack that sleaze ball convicted perjurer EVILBILL…
If she wants a fight all the way to the convention floor then
Obama should use a scorched Earth policy against her….
Funny how everyone says that Obama can’t win the white
vote,, hmmmm seems to me that the Sith queen can’t win
the black vote…..In Michigan 40% of the voters said none
of the above,, and who’s name was on the ballot?...
40% of Michigan voters wouldn’t even vote for her even tho
she was the only one on the ballot…And she takes it as a victory…
Its sad that she has come this far when its clear than she is an
Egomaniac and must always have her own way…The rules of the
primaries and caucus’ were set up before any votes were cast,,
the ballots for Michigan and Florida were disallowed before any
votes were cast…Everyone of the democratic candidates agreed to
this arrangement and said OK,, that the rules that have been set
up and that’s how we’ll proceed,, the Sith queen signed the
agreement…And now at the 11:58 hour of the campaign she wants
to change the rules,, mainly because she lost…If the situation were
reversed,, how hard would she fight against allowing Michigan
and Florida to be counted?...It scares me to think that if she ever
becomes President,, that since she has no regard for established
rules that offend her or she doesn’t like that she will cast them
aside and demand new ones…What about all the rules in the
Salt agreements,, does she like all those? or if when she’s President
will she have them changed to better suit her ideas…
What about all our trade agreements,, NAFTA,, immigration,,
etc etc?…If she can’t abide by the rules of the game in the
democratic primaries,, what rules can she abide by?....
Rules that she signed her name to…
As Worf would say…”She has no honor”…The ‘Pantsuit Brigades’
that are her followers,, I can only think have now entered what
is known as the ‘Stockholm Syndrome’,, and are locked into an
unchangeable mindset,, like the followers of Jim Jones,,
or Heavens Gate…Her refusal to accept the fact that she was
beaten by ‘OMG’ a black man is a sad commentary on her,,
and I think it will hurt women in politics in general…
She should be put out to pasture as soon as possible,,
so her vile contempt for everything ‘Not Hillary’ will not
infect anyone else……..

The Queen is dead,, lets hope she stays buried………

Friday, May 30, 2008

BATHROOM REMODEL..........

BATHROOM REMODEL………….

I’d like to take a few moments here to speak to
just the guys out there…To talk to them about an idea
they have,, about doing something extra special for
their ‘honeybunny’,, while she’s away at her mothers
for the week…Your thinking of remodeling that porta-pottie
bathroom of yours while she’s away,, aren’t you?...
Thinking of surprising her with a bran spanking gleaming new
bathroom aren’t you?...Afterall she’s been nagging you for two
years to do it,, hasn’t she?...And now while she’s away you think
it would be a great idea to do it…
Whoooaaa,, hold on there “Norm”…before you start,,
lets examine some of the skills you have to get this done…

Have you ever done any plumbing?...OH,, you replaced the
fittings on the garden hose and replaced the rubber washers
in the kitchen sink…Yeah,, that’s almost like plumbing…
Have you ever done any electrical?...Fixed a lamp cord huh?...
And found the short in the riding lawnmower…
Well,, good for you…Have you ever installed any cabinets?...
Or done any tile work?...Any carpentry skills?...OH,, you have a
book that shows how to do everything step by step,, do you?…
With colored diagrams and exploded parts views,, huh?...
That should help…

First off,, what do you plan on doing?...OH,, you want to make
your new bathroom look just like the one on page 47 in
Home & Gardens…Ah uh…Not so fast “Mr Handyman”…
That bathroom your looking at is at least 500 sf,, with
a separate shower area,, with temperature controlled full body
shower heads,, it has an 8ft x 10ft whirlpool/hottub,,
that seats 6 people,, with adjustable jets,, with foot and neck
massaging bubbles…A mens sink area and a separate area for
her with two sinks,, a seating area with adjustable wall mounted
mirrors,, and it has a toilet,, and a bidet just for her,,
with granite countertops and imported Italian marble tile on all
the walls…Have you ever done anything like that before?...
Well,, let me clue you in just a little,, before you run to the nearest
hardware store and try to purchase any of that stuff…
That bathroom your wishing for,, and wanting to build in a week,,
took 14 skilled craftsman 3 months to build,, and they knew
what they were doing…You do not…
Plus it will cost you more than the house you are now living in…

Right about this time,, your beginning to ask yourself,,
“What the h*ll does this guy know about remodeling a bathroom”…
“Why should I listen to him”…You are aren’t you?...Well,,
let me just say that I was in your position a couple of years ago,,
I thought I’d do something nice for my ‘snoogems’…
It took me three days to remove everything from the bathroom
and haul it to the dump,, then disaster struck…
My ‘honeydo’ came home early,, because she had a big fight
with her mother,, and needless to say she was not pleased with
the mess that used to be our (her) bathroom…I ended up sleeping
in the garage for two weeks,, before she calmed down enough
that I could talk to her…Then it took 5 months to get the
bathroom fixed…Mainly because we (she) decided to hire a
contractor and have him do the work…It took 5 months because,,
well,, there are a lot of decisions to make and as you know it
takes a woman a long time to make a decision…I had very little
input into those decisions,, of course she asked me what
I thought about this or that,, but I learned very quickly,,
with the first 15 minutes,, that what I thought was not really
important,, so from there on in,, I just said Uh Uh a lot…
You think I’m exaggerating don’t you?...
Remember the last time the two of you got dressed up for a
night on the town and dinner at a fancy restaurant?...
How long did it take her in the bathroom to get ready?...
One hour?... An hour and a half?... For what?...How long did it
take you?...15 minutes,, right?...But that was only because
you decided to shave and brush your teeth…
I’m right aren’t I?...It takes a women a long time to make
a decision…

Now before you start your remodeling,, I want you to think
about a couple of things…When was the last time you,,
and you alone were allowed to make a decision?...You know that
she has to tell you to take out the trash,, and how to do it…
And she always complains that you didn’t do it right…
And do you realize that there are 47 different shades of pink?...
And here you are,, ready to make all kinds of decisions about
your (her) bathroom,, none of which she will agree with…
If I were you,, I’d just sit back and watch sports on TV while
she’s away,, it will be your only chance,, and sit around in your
underwear drinking a cold one while scratching your private
parts whenever you want,, cuz she’s going to be home soon…

As a final note here to you guys out there,, let me just say,,
that now that I’ve lived with my ‘new’ bathroom a while,,
I don’t mind the 7 shades of pink with mauve accents,, and
the foam toilet seat is a lot nicer that the hard one we used to have…
But I do get in a lot of trouble if I don’t hang the towel back
on the rod,, or put a new roll of TP out,, or leave the cap off the
toothpaste,, or leave water on the counter,, or don’t put my dirty
clothes in the hamper,, or don’t put the toilet seat down,,
or just generally do man things…You know now that I think
about it,, having a gleaming new bathroom really sucks…………

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

WHY CAN'T................

JFHC
YOU TRY TO BE NICE AND SHOW
SOME CONCERN FOR SOMEONE,,
SOMEONE WHO IS NOT FEELING WELL
AND YOU GET IN AN ARGUMENT…….
AND YES IT WAS A WOMAN……
SO I ASK………..


PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Why can't a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
Eternally noble, historically fair.
Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat.
Why can't a woman be like that?
Why does every one do what the others do?
Can't a woman learn to use her head?
Why do they do everything their mothers do?
Why don't they grow up, well, like their father instead?

Why can't a woman take after a man?
Men are so pleasant, so easy to please.
Whenever you're with them, you're always at ease.

Would you be slighted if I didn't speak for hours?

COLONEL PICKERING:
Of course not.

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Would you be livid if I had a drink or two?

COLONEL PICKERING:
Nonsense.

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Would you be wounded if I never sent you flowers?

COLONEL PICKERING:
Never.

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Well, why can't a woman be like you?

One man in a million may shout a bit.
Now and then, there's one with slight defects.
One perhaps whose truthfulness you doubt a bit,
But by and large we are a marvelous sex!

Why can't a woman take after a man?
'Cause men are so friendly, good-natured and kind.
A better companion you never will find.

If I were hours late for dinner would you bellow?

COLONEL PICKERING:
Of course not.

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
If I forgot your silly birthday, would you fuss?

COLONEL PICKERING:
Nonsense.

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Would you complain if I took out another fellow?

Pickering
Never.

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Why can't a woman be like us?

PROFESSOR HIGGINS:
Why can't a woman be more like a man?
Men are so decent, such regular chaps;
Ready to help you through any mishaps;
Ready to buck you up whenever you're glum.
Why can't a woman be a chum?

Why is thinking something women never do?
And why is logic never even tried?
Straightening up their hair is all they ever do.
Why don't they straighten up the mess that's inside?

Why can't a woman behave like a man?
If I was a woman who'd been to a ball,
Been hailed as a princess by one and by all;
Would I start weeping like a bathtub overflowing,
Or carry on as if my home were in a tree?
Would I run off and never tell me where I'm going?
Why can't a woman be like me?

WOMEN MUST REALLY BE AN ALIEN RACE........
I'M TIRED..............

Monday, May 26, 2008

IN MEMORY...............

IN MEMORY……………..

Iwo Jima laid in wait
It was a devils gate
Bastards battling on the black sand beach
Mt. Suribachi’s blackened dome loomed
In its shadow many would meet their doom…

Raise it higher and higher
The marines did say
And this they did that fateful day
The Stars and Stripes raised up high
Atop the mountains crown for all to see
The start of an island victory…

Wailing among the volcanic sand
Each man lent a helping hand
The flag does wave above them all
Cheers of joy,, tears of sorrow
Another battle on the morrow…

The black sand stained red with the
Life blood of young marines
The world be thankful they battled the evil tide
In the shadow of Mt. Suribachi they died
Dying for freedoms voice,, side by side
Simper fi…………

IN MEMORY……………..

In paradise,, everyone could dream
Morning’s soft light gleaming on the bay
Gray painted battleships all in a row
Lazy day of an early Sunday morn
All too easy to think all is norm
Just another day to while away
The band did play

From a hue of blue they flew
Watching from above the ships below
All was ready to strike the blow
Planes sent for destruction from Tokyo
Lighting steaming into battleship row
Bombs and torpedoes make the gray forms glow
A day of victory,, a day of infamy

Sailors and seamen caught by surprise
Tora,, Tora was the battle cry
Young warriors who would never be
Dead sons amid the fiery sea
Devastation all along the great gray line
Sinking giants and tears like rain
Trapped forever in gray steel tombs
Remember this day that these are heroes too….


IN MEMORY……………..

Green is the color all men know
Green is the color of heroes bold
Khaki brown in the forgotten sands
Khaki brown in far off lands
Colors of the earthen ground
Colors of valor the world around

From the beginning,, over here over there
Youths of valor have always been near
Striving in weather others would not toil
They go forth to give all for freedoms soil
Endless journeys in leather boots
Step apon step add up the mile
Weary are they that wear the colors
Youthful stares with a gallows smile

On distant shores,, in places without names
Pencil drawn battle lines on a map
Always forward never back
In foxholes shallow,, in streets of destruction
Forward forward till the day is won
Boots on the ground freeing the towns
Wayward are the thoughts of tomorrow
Just buddies beside during the battle roar
I can not ask them to give me anymore
For they give me all,, when they wear the
Colors of valor…………..


IN MEMORY……………..

In machines of mechanical marvel
Flying boxcars and silver arrows
Contrails formed in the sky hues
Streaking pass the speed of sound
Hurling thunderbolts to the ground
Climbing ever higher near the edge of space
The breast of men silver wings grace

Fighters streaking past in a blink of an eye
Bombers above unloading their deadly scythe
Transports of warriors and supplies
Metal monsters fill the sky
Props and jets testing mans limit
In cavernous hulks and cockpits small
Brave ones hear the call

Blessed defenders for men on the ground
Destruction delivered both by day and night
Striking mortal devils from an unseen height
Tis man alone that takes mechanical flight
Enola Gay ended one mighty fight
Let us pray for them each and every night
Angels on our shoulders that take to flight...........................

PHOENIX PROBE.........

This is one of the first photos from the Phoenix Probe which
landed on Mars on Sunday............

Go to AstroBobs igloo for all the gory details.....
http://blackholesandastrostuff.blogspot.com/

Sunday, May 25, 2008

BAR TIME FUN...............

BAR TIME FUN…………

You know its amazing what happens in a darkened bar…
I was at my favorite sorrows drowning pool just the other day,,
yes it was a Tuesday…Double shot Tuesday as a matter of fact…
I’d only been there about 3 hours,, I know that because I still had
some cigarettes left and the barkeep had only refilled my stale
popcorn bowl 5 times…The barkeep,, I’ll just call him Joe,,
after all I don’t want to get sued or anything,, kept on renewing
my subscription to Bacardi and coke when my glass was empty,,
so by this time I was feeling mellow and totally relaxed…
I didn’t know many of the ‘guests’ that night,, there was Hank
over in his usual spot…
I think he’s welded to that chair,, I’d never been in there,,
when he wasn’t there,, and he never gets up to use the men’s room,,
I wouldn’t either but I don’t like to walk around in wet shoes…
There was a small crowd of kids playing pool and an older couple
in one of the booths,, that was about it…

I was just finishing a handful of circa1975 popcorn when a young
blonde sat down at the bar only a couple of stools away from me…
She gave me a once over,, a look that said no thanks,, and I gave
her the full 360…I knew that nothing would happen and that
I was too old for her,, but looking is free,, at least where I come
from,, and she didn’t have a male friend with her,, so it was even
more free…She ordered a White Russian from Joe and settled
into her stool…I didn’t give her a thought,, at least none that
I can write about here…
She pulled out a pack of Marlboros,, took one and placed
it between her lips,, then began fumbling thru her purse for
her lighter…that’s when I made my move,, I reached over and
flicked my 79c bic and she accepted…

The opening gambit was signed,, sealed and delivered,,
so I moved over next to her,, she gave me a tight lipped smile
and we began to talk…
You know how it is,, small talk at first,, jockeying for position,,
not wanting to give too much away,, not wanting to scare the fish
as it where…Since I was much older than her and I was far ahead
of her in the empty glass department I had an easy time going
thru the ritual of bar speak… She seemed to be fairly new to the
game and was somewhat off balance on which way to go…
Then she asked me the question I was waiting for…

“What kind of work do you do?”…

Well not wanting to describe what kind of crummy life I have,,
I had an answer already for her…

“I’m an agent for the CIA”…I said,, giving my best
impression of James Bond that I had…

“Oh,, really” she said…”I’ve been looking for an agent,,
I want to become a singer”…

Bingo!!!...Two down and one to go…Just had to get her
drunk and the sheet music would be playing…I just hoped that
the melody would rise to the occasion…

I’m not really sure how long we played footsy in that bar…
I just remember waking up in Duluth Minn,, which is about
300 miles from Joes bar…She was gone,, my clothes were gone,,
along with my wallet and my car…I was left there lying on the
motel bed wearing a Star Wars storm trooper outfit with a
pink tutu and bunny slippers…You don’t know how hard it was
to call my brother to come and get me…To this day the words
“Star Wars or Blonde Bimbo” are not used around me…
I’m scared to death that someday my adventures,,
whatever they were,, will show up on a YouTube video………...

Thursday, May 22, 2008

SIGNS AT THE TABLE..............

I wonder,, how well do I really know these guys at this table?...
Mike there,, has been my neighbor for years,, and my brother
Jim,, well he’s been around almost as long as I have…
But do I really know them,, what do I really know?...
Can they be trusted,, or are they just trying to pull a fast one…
I know what they think of me…Not to swift on the uptake
they say…Can’t read the signs…Yeah right…

I’ve been here all night,, same as them…I’m doing alright…
I wonder what they would do if the king was to fall,, or maybe
the queen…Would it make a difference to them?...
What then?...Maybe everyone has already made their choices,,
maybe it wouldn’t matter at all…One by one they make their
choices,, some take the chance…others don’t...How well do
I really know these guys at this table?...

“Hey Frank,, Frank…its your bet…are you in or out?”...

“I’m in…I call…….Kings over Queens…read em and weep”…

Not a bad pot for someone who can’t read the signs,,
I think to myself……………...


Special Editors Note:

inspired by one of Swubirds tall tales.............

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

HILLARYDILLARY MATH............

Even at a young age HillaryDillary wasn't any good at math...
But little old (white) ladies with blue hair and welfare checks
still liked her...............

If HillaryDillary's butt gets much bigger,, I'm going to have to
get a 52" wide plasma TV just to fit it on the screen..........

Some people hate spiders,, some hate bugs,, or snakes or mice,,
I hate HillaryDillary (always have)..............

After this is all over (in Aug) I'm not sure what I'll have to rant about.....

And why is it that every photo that you see of the Sith Queen,,
its mouth is always open.......Waiting for another piece of pie
perhaps,, or is it sucking in the souls of its followers...........

Sunday, May 18, 2008

ITS AMAZING...............

ITS AMAZING………….

Its amazing that I even make it home some days…
It was just the other day,, yes it was a Tuesday…
There I was driving home on the freeway after work,,
at about my usual time,, doing about 70 as usual…
Just minding by own business trying to weave thru the
nutsos that are allowed to have a drivers license…
The freeway was packed with cars and semis like it is
every night on my drive home…

I’m driving along in the middle lane,, surrounded on all
sides by cars and semis…H*ll,, I’ll bet that half the semis
in the USA were trying to fly down the freeway along with me…
There I am driving,, tired as can be from working all
day,, one eye open and the other one shut,, driving as
safely as I can,, maintaining a gap between me and the cars ahead,,
just in case…But that’s not good enough for some drivers…
All of a sudden a guy,, yes I’m sorry to say it was a male driver,,
comes flyin up behind me and is hugging my bumper like a
crazed alien invader humping a donut,, blaring his horn and
flashing his lights,, for me to move over and get out of his way…
I didn’t know what he expected me to do,, I was trapped on all
sides by other cars and semis…So he’s back there doing his best
Canadian goose imitation,, and I could see him in my rearview
just screaming and pounding his hands on his steering wheel,,
like its my fault that the freeway is crowded…

Well finally after a couple of minutes of him shinning my bumper
for me,, I’m able to move over to the left,, and then he guns it and
goes flyin by me,, I look over and he’s looking at me like he’s going
to jump out of his car and strangle me…There he goes,,
don’t know where,, its as crowded up ahead as it is here…
I slide back over into the middle lane,, (mainly because I don’t
like driving behind semis that are hauling live hogs,, live hogs
tend to pee a lot and they don’t use porta-potties) and I watch
this nutso…I’m thinking “there’s an accident waiting to happen”…
I’m watching him and he’s locked up behind the car that was in
front of me,, getting nowhere,, he’s boxed in on both sides,,
then he guns it and squeezes in kind of diagonally in front of the
car on his right…I watch him as he flys down the freeway doing
the same New Jersey cab driver maneuvers to everyone
around him,, until I lost sight of him in a herd of semis…
I’m glad he’s away from me…

Then it happened,, all the brake lights in front of me turned red…
Everyone’s slowing down and some are braking hard,,
I look up ahead and can see that cars and semis are trying to find
room to stop,, their angling to the right and left,, and a couple of
cars drive into the median,, just to avoid everyone else…
I’m slamming on my brakes,, and going from 70 to nothing in
about 5 seconds,, I just hoped that the 5 million ton semi behind
me could stop in time,, before I ended up with a Peterbilt in my
front seat…
About this time,, is when it became unreal,, it was like one of those
scenes you see in a movie,, I still can’t believe it,, it was amazing,,
hopefully a once in a lifetime event,, certainly something you don’t
want to be anywhere near,, unless your seated in a darkened
room eating $5 popcorn,, and I wasn’t…It may look fantastic on
the big screen but I can tell you,, it will scare the crap out of you,,
not give you any change back and you’ll find religion real fast…
There wasn’t a damn thing I could do,, I was boxed in on all sides,,
all I could do was watch as everything started happening
around me…
It was frightening,, and fascinating all at the same time…

Needless to say I came out of it alive,, not a scratch on me or
my car…I’m just thankful that all the chickens didn’t get out
of their cages,, because with all the marshmallows and corn syrup
on the freeway it would really have been a disaster………........

Friday, May 16, 2008

GRIPES 2.0................

GRIPES 2.0……………
Thank goodness 07,, is over with…What a rotten year,,
I guess it could have been worse tho…In 06,, I was
screwed over 52 times,, but in 07,, I was only screwed
over 38 times…I guess I’m making progress,, or maybe its
because I now carry around with me a fully loaded elephant gun,,
people seem to be much nicer to you when you carry around a
loaded cannon…But I’m rambling,, stay with me,, there’s a point
to this story somewhere,, I just have to get to it…As many of you
who are not reading this know,, gt281 works in an office,,
5 stinking days of the week…My job is to put pretty lines on the
silicone matter screen using King Gates’ wonderfully confusing
Windowrama program,, and a program called Autocad…
I make pretty colored lines on the screen to show how millwork
is to be built,, so the imported Honduras labor force we have in
the shop area can easily put the millwork together,, and then it
can be sent to the far flung work zones of the known world…
Follow me so far?...
Good,, it gets worse as I go rambling along…

I like Autocad,, it does everything for me,, IF I put the correct
information into it,, which happens only about 7% of the time…
So everything I do is wrong 93% of the time… Why?...
It’s because the information that I’m given to work with is
100% wrong 100% of the time…So being right 7% of the time
is pretty good if you ask me,, but nobody does and I get
yelled at a lot…I get my erroneous information from a number
of sources,, mainly someone called a PM,, (that’s shorthand for
pompous meathead),, the contractor who wants the millwork
delivered last Wednesday,, and of course I get my erroneous
information from the Architects plans or blueprints,, which I
laughingly call the ‘YOU GOT TO BE KIDDING ME
CRAYON SCRIBBLINGS OF A NUTSO'…

I don’t mind so much the bad information coming from the PM,,
he works for my company and is just trying to save every last
nickel he can out of the project budget…The project budget is
always wrong and underbid by the estimating department,,
so I give the PM a little slack…I don’t give a smelly fart what
the contractor wants,, mainly because I don’t have to deal
with him,, the PM does…And we all know that contractors
are greasy lying bald Hungarian dwarfs anyway…
Nobody likes Hungarians,, except Norwegian fjord fishermen,,
but their all drunk from drinking to much cod liver beer,,
so they don’t count…It’s the Architect I hate the most…
Here’s a PROFESSIONAL who has gone to college for 5 years,,
and understudied with another Architect for 3 years before
he/she/it could even get their license,, and they have to every
year get more educational school credits to keep their license…
So you would think they were pretty smart wouldn’t you?...
Not so fast Homer…The plans I get are 100% crap-ola,, well not
all of them,, I’m exaggerating a bit,, only 99.98% are crap…

I fumble and weave my way thru these plans trying to find out
what’s happening,, what the layout of millwork is,, where
everything goes,, what is this,, etc etc,, so I can put correct
information into Autocad to create shop drawings for
making the millwork…

Still with me?...ok,, you should now be very very afraid of
sitting in the building you work in,, because I’ve seen the
types of plans the Architect makes to build that building your in…
It’s a wonder anything can be built at all,, the plans I get have
no dimensions on them,, and the notes and descriptions of parts
of the building are always wrong,, and they never match from
page to page…So who knows what you’ll end up with…
Architects really piss me off…You ever try to tell an Architect
that a 3 foot wide door will not fit into a 2 foot wide opening?...
Don’t,, because it will only make Gods handpicked designer of all
things,, mad,, and then he/she/it will get all puffy and out of joint
nose wise…So its just better to play along and put a 3 foot wide
door into a 2 foot wide opening…Then what happens?...
The God Architect gets all hissy and starts asking why nobody
told him/her/it that a 3 foot wide door will not fit into a 2 foot
wide opening…We didn’t tell you because you don’t listen,,
you fat headed cape wearing moron,, besides its your design,,
your suppose to give us the correct information to build it correctly…
Fathead…Then he/she/it will say its design-build,, and magically
will be off the hook for all the trouble he/she/it has caused to
get his/her/its masterpiece of modernism construction built…

If any of you listeners are thinking of getting into my line of work,,
don’t…I have to:
#1…make the shop drawings and submit them to the God
#2…make changes to them after God has reviewed them
#2a…return them to God so he/she/it can redesign them again
#3…change the shop drawings after getting field notes and dimensions…
All the while listening to everybody ask,, ‘When are you going
to be done?’…
I had a job once where I had to change a closet ceiling 8 times,,
before the God Architect accepted them…It was only a closet
3 ft by 4 ft with a ceiling that nobody would ever see…

So to you,, I suggest that you become a God Architect,, then you
can blame everybody else for everything,, and take all the credit
for everything…
See I told you I would get to my point sooner or later…
I hate Architects………......................

Thursday, May 15, 2008

GOOD NEWS..........

This just in from FaerieKAt…………
I received an E-gram from FaerieKat today and
she says shes fighting hard against her pain…
Shes still with us,, and wishes to thank everyone
for their kind thoughts and well wishes…

She says that shes having a lot of pain and trouble with
her hands and arms due to tendonitis and HAE….
She was a ‘bad’ Wicca and didn’t go see her doctor
when things started hurting,, so now her Meds are screwed
up and shes having to get everything readjusted…
Typing and Blogging give her a lot of pain,, so shes
resting a lot and doing exercises to strengthen her hands
and arms…it may be awhile before shes able to get back to
her usual Witched Wicca self…

Shes antsy to get back to Blogging and to catch up with
everyones great stories on their Blogs…it will just take a
little longer….

You can visit her site and leave her a get well message
….http://faeriekat.wordpress.com…..or leave one here
for her and I’ll E-gram your comments……..

While everything is not 100% with FaerieKat I still think
it is good news to hear from her….If you don’t know what
HAE is,, you can get more info on it from her site……..

I’ll update things about FaerieKat if I hear more……

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

THIS IS A SPECIAL BLOGLAND ALERT....

.
"Good evening Mr and Mrs America,, from border to border
and coast to coast and all the ships at sea…
Let's go to press.”…


All Blogland creatures should be on the lookout for one
FaerieKat,, a female Blogger…also a Wicca Witch to the fourth level…
whereabouts unknown,, last seen 5-02-08…Any person or
creature having knowledge of the status or whereabouts of
FaerieKat should report it immediately to the proper authorities (me)…

Thank you for your support………….


http://faeriekat.wordpress.com

Monday, May 12, 2008

THE JIM JONES EFFECT..........

Delusion…….
1. false belief
a persistent false belief held in the face of strong contradictory
evidence,, especially as a symptom of a psychiatric condition…
2. mistaken notion
a false or mistaken belief or idea about something…
(Encarta Dictionary)

Psychotic…….
1. affected by psychosis
relating to,, characteristic of,, or affected by psychosis…
(Encarta Dictionary)

Psychosis……
1. loss of contact with reality
a psychiatric disorder such as schizophrenia or mania that is marked
by delusions,, hallucinations,, incoherence,, and distorted perceptions of reality…
(Encarta Dictionary)

Mania………..
1. obsession
an excessive and intense interest in or enthusiasm for something…
2. psychiatric disorder
a psychiatric disorder characterized by excessive physical activity,,
rapidly changing ideas,, and impulsive behavior…
(Encarta Dictionary)

Distorted perceptions of reality…………
1. give inaccurate report of something
transitive verb to describe or report something in an inaccurate or misleading way…
(Encarta Dictionary)

Hmmm,, I wonder if any of these definitions fit anybody?.......
(besides me of course)……….

Saturday, May 10, 2008

MY MAMA...............

MY MAMA…………………

I wrote this poime for my Mama……..

M….is for the Many things she does for me

U….is for the Uther things she does

T….is for the Times she saved me from Paw

H….is for the Honey she lets me have

R….is for the Really Really big hugs she gives to me

E….is for Everything

And that spells my Mama…

I luv my Mama,, she cares for me…
Oh,, my Mama………..


Wasn't that nice Henry?...

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

ANOTHER QUESTION...........

What the H*ll is that 5 star rating thing at the bottom of my
blogs?...where did it come from?...is it something Blogger
turned on,, or did I?... and how do I get rid of it?..........

What the H*ll am I asking you for?...
You don't know.......Geeezzzzzz...... :-)

QUESTION OF THE DAY.............

Ok,, here’s the set-up………
The HillaryDillary Rodham I’m just like you
(if you were worth 120 million) I will roll up my sleeves and
work for you I get it I’m not an elitist I could be a waitress
I was cheated in Michigan and Florida the one and only
all knowing Clinton takes the nomination process all the
way to the Democratic convention and there she tries some
cigar filled backroom politics but still loses the Democratic
nomination to Barack Obama…She forces a fake smile and
immediately leaves the convention,, and after (maybe)
Barack Obama wins the Presidency,, she goes back to the
Senate (where she doesn’t belong,, but that’s another story)……..
Got all that?...OK…

Here’s the question….If Barack Obama becomes President
and the Sith queen (aka Hillary) is in the Senate,, do you think
she will be spiteful towards Barack and try to undermind/block
/deter/foil/ruin/defeat every action that Barack Obama makes
as President,, just so she can say…
“Ah ha…see I told you,, you should of voted for me”…
On second thought,, nevermind…I already know the answer to
that question…I’ve seen this type of slug slime before…

And to any women readers I might have out there in Blogland,,
if you think that I detest the Hillary just because she’s a woman…
then you belittle me…
If you are for the Hillary just because she is a woman…
then you belittle yourself…
Think about it…………..


In ancient times the HillaryDillary could be killed in a variety of ways,, such as staking,, burning,, decapitating,, or even striking with a blessed knife or sword... Sometimes,, the evil spirit possessing what was really just a corpse could be driven out by means of excommunication... In modern mythology,, only a wooden stake through the heart tends to be effective... if the head is cut off,, garlic should be placed between it and the neck,, and the liberal application of blessed crucifixes is desirable............................

Monday, May 5, 2008

KIDS TODAY................

KIDS TODAY…………….

Oooh,, I don’t know what’s the matter with kids these days…
They have everything…cellphones,, Bluetooths in their ears,,
Wii,, playstation,, fancy clothes…

Oooh,, my yes…They have to have everything…why when I
was a kid we didn’t have anything like that…

Oooh,, you’re so right…Why we were so poor we had to live in a
cardboard box behind a dumpster…we didn’t have all the gadgets
kids have today…

Oooh my yes…You had a cardboard box?....why all we had was
paper bags to live in…Why,, my three sisters and I would have to
share 1 paper bag…My,, we were so poor we had to wear plastic
jugs for shoes…

You had shoes?...Why,, we had to make our own shoes using
the tin foil from chewing gum wrappers….Oooh my,, kids these
days have everything…I remember we were so poor we had
to eat dirt…

You had dirt?...Why my father used to feed us the glue from the
back of postage stamps…It was nothing like today…kids today
just drive up and order fish and chips like it was nothing at all…

Oooh my,, you are so right…Kids today in their fancy cars with
the radios blastin away…Why when I was a kid we had to walk
12 kilometers in the freezing rain,, just to use the lu in the park…

You had a lu?…Why when I was a kid,, we had to climb over
10 meter fences just to find a bush…

Oooh my…Kids today they have it so easy…

Oooh yes,, you are so right…Come on,, what do you say we pop
on over to the pub for a few pints…

Oooh that sounds like a wonderful idea…Then we can beat the
crap out of one of the little buggers and take their I-pod away…

Oooh sounds exciting to me………………

Thursday, May 1, 2008

THE TIN MAN

BEFORE THERE WAS ROBOCOP........................


BEFORE THERE WAS IRON MAN.................


THERE WAS THE TIN MAN................
Yes the TIN MAN,, created by man in his own image…
A marvel of mechanical technology...
Able to stand for eons…
Able to withstand wind rain and hail…
Able to chop down a tree with a single blow…
Watch him as he defends little Dorothy and Toto from the
Wicked Witch of the West…
Watch him as he defies the Wicked Witch's fireballs…
He dances...
He sings…
He clinks he clanks…
He swings his mighty axe…
Follow him on his adventures to the Emerald City…
See him fight off the flyin monkeys…
See him rebuild the Scarecrow with his bare hands...
All this and more...

Coming soon to a metro-plex near you…
Chills,, thrills,, spills for all ages in
the stupendous,, marvelous,, Technicolor extravaganza

..........THE WIZARD OF OZ……….


Please visit our concession stand for
some delicious hot buttered popcorn
and candy………and Toto too……