Something to ponder on as you wander on


Some liars are born that way, some are self-made; but the really great ones are elected to Congress…
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Thursday, July 31, 2008

IT'S NEWS TIME......

IT’S ON YAHOO SO YOU KNOW IT’S IMPORTANT…..

1…Katherine Heigl's "Grey's" remarks landed her in hot water, and she’s a 'Lightning rod'….
…..two things that never should be mixed,, water and electricity…if she wants to be in hot water,, I have a hot tub…

2…It's official: Red planet is a wet planet…
Coming soon your favorite flavors of snow cones and sking
Villas soon to be constructed in the Vastitas Borealis plateau region…

3…Why more men are wearing shorts to work…
Damn UPS drivers,, now look what they’ve started…

4…Pentagon makes fighting global extremism its top priority…
I thought it already was,, what the hell have they been doing for the past 5 years…

5…Rare total solar eclipse draws crowds of tourists to Siberia…
Where they were immediately mugged as soon as the eclipse started…

6…Spider found in Calif. becomes tribute to Stephen Colbert…
I found a spider in my backyard I’d like to be a tribute to
HillaryDillary….I miss her already…not…

7…See the creepy ‘Potter’ trailer…
I’d rather have my tongue pulled out thru my butthole…
The whole series smells of Hogfarts…

8…Congress moves to ban in-flight cell phone calls on airplanes…
Thank God,, now at least we’ll have some place safe from
idiots with cell phones stuck in their ears…expect this legislation to pass in about 3 years,, that’s how fast Congress
moves…I think they need some Kaopectate…

9…McCain accuses Obama of playing race card…
Gee,, if it was me I would have played the queen of hearts and then yelled Gin….

10…Man accused of killing, dismembering girlfriend…
Good thing he was only accused of this,, otherwise things
could get messy…in a bloody body parts in the freezer kind of way…

11…Lindsay Lohan fires back at L.A. police chief for 'gay' remark…
I guess she wasn’t very happy about his jovial remark,, but it’s still
unfair for her to unload a 45 at him…even if it is just Hollywood…

12…Obama slams McCain over tax breaks for Big Oil…
It was a right and then a left,, Obama face plants McCain
into the canvas…the ref steps in,, 7,, 8,, 9,, 10…he’s out…

13…Solar eclipse won't spook Olympics…
Thank God,, I was worried all day about that…

14…U.N. approves another year of peacekeeping in Darfur…
Oh,, boy…another year watching the blue helmeted smurfs do nothing…

15…Liquid found on Saturn’s moon,, scientists positively identified the presence of ethane…
This is good,, now all we need is a really long hose to reach the gas station…

16…Car expert offers 3 simple tips to battle high gas prices…
#1…take a bus…#2…walk to work…#3…carpool…

17… Alleged thief stuck under trash bin for 12 hours…
My only question is,, why didn’t they just leave him there?...

18…Elizabeth Taylor visits hospital, to return home…
Didn’t she die 5 years ago?...don’t care…

19…Shareholder wrath
Frustrated Yahoo! shareholders are expected to lambaste management at the company's annual meeting…
Lets hope some of this ends up on You-Tube,, nothing better
than to watch CEOs get Bar-B-Qed…

3 comments:

Lorelei said...

I'm glad no men at my work wear shorts.

I left a gift for you at Blogsdon.

Swubird said...

gt281:

I liked them all, but number is my favorite. Now if we can only get cellphones, and those little gadgets people put in their ears, banned from our bookstores, I'd be satisfied. Nothing pisses me off more than somebody talking on their cellphone in the bookstore when I'm trying to read. Wait, there is one more thing that pisses me off even more than that. It's people walking around the store seemingly talking to no one because they have that little gadget in their ear. I'd like to sneak up behind one of those dimwits and blow a bullhorn next to their ear. HEAR ME NOW? Jerks!

Thanks, that felt good.

Happy trails.

gt281 said...

to Swubird:
don't look now but your favorite number has gone missing...
go here to find out what to do
about cell phones...
...medical alert 8-11-07....

haunted forest paths to you too...