Is this thing on? Hello, hello?...Yes I can see that the red light is on…ok…

     Hello sports fans, I’m back once again, you’ve had your chance to escape and now you’ll regret tuning in…Today’s story is an excellent example of the epic saga of heroes, villains and things that go bump in the night, that has taken a nasty left turn into the realm of really, really bad story telling…But what the hey, it’s almost free, all you have to do is waste some of your life clock by reading it. Sorry do refunds, or do overs…What? Oh right…The bald headed nerd in the glass booth says that it’s time for a commercial, so stay tuned and we’ll be right back with the first part of many parts of this incredibly realistic autobiographical saga of a time gone by…

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EDITOR’S NOTE:

     No animals were hurt or mangled during the production of this story, however two Canadian gnomes were squished by a speeding arctic glacier while intoxicated from imbibing in too much fermented pickle juice as they tried to milk a moose. In their intoxicated state (Manitoba) they failed to realize that the moose they were trying to milk was actually a bull moose, needless to say, but I’ll say it anyway, they were knocked unconscious when the bull moose kicked them both in the head…The moose was not harmed in anyway except for a nasty rash it got that lasted for six weeks…The moose eventually recovered and moved to Frostbite Falls where it rented a small wooden bungalow that it had to share with a squirrel, they became great friends and saved the entire world 57 ½ times from a nefarious fiend named Fearless Leader…

     Now on with the show…I know that you’ll hate it, bcuz it’s loooooong…and it has no naked swamp swans in it……

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               Journey Days of Henry McAlister…

                                                          CHAPTER ONE
                                                       Chapter one-part one

Fate never tires of testing one’s being against its wheel…

     To be rid of it was all his father wanted, and now they were both gone, one in a moment of explosive force and the other by an accident that should never have happened. The painted white crosses seemed to stand silently watching, as if the barren wind swept graveyard with its boundary lined by the wood and wire fence row was not enough to let everyone know what this place was. A place of ends, a place of beginnings. Henry stood beside his mother trying to comfort her as best he knew how, but he knew that he could do nothing to relive her sorrow, no words could he speak that would bring light into her world on this day, his was just to be there, to be there if needed, to do what every son does when tragedy spreads its dark shroud. Henry bent down and gathered a handful of soil, it slipped through his fingers and scattered dust in the breeze as he let it fall onto the wooden box below. He watched as the gravedigger began his somber task of returning the ground to its former shape, and the preacher gave one last prayer and then turned and walked back down towards the line of wagons. An end to his plans of leaving for the California frontier to search for the golden grains of rock that filled his dreams every night, his mother would need him more then ever now, a new life, a new beginning, as the man of the house. He could not leave now as so many of his friends had, they had left behind sisters and brothers that could share the burdens, but he had none.
                                                                           #

     Henry stood near the wagon watching his father, Clayton, preparing the hole under the oak stump, ready for the placement of the dynamite that he would use to blast the stump from its rooted grip on the brown earth. The stump with its coiled and thick roots had resisted all of Clayton and Henry’s efforts to remove it by axe and shovel, and even applying the force of Ole Ned tied to a rope had done little to move it, and now Clayton had decided to be done with this chore and rid himself of what he considered a blight on his farm field by the use of dynamite which would vanquish his foe and all that would be left would be to clean up the remains and level the ground once more for the seed. Henry could remember sitting under that giant oak tree when he was a boy, or perhaps it was not a memory but rather parts of a dream than was now obscured by the haze of time, on a forgotten Sunday afternoon with his mother, sitting under its shady branches on a warmer fall afternoon after the harvest had been completed, his father would allow it sometimes, but only on a Sunday and only after all the needed daily chores had been done around the farm, the feeding of the animals, the filling of water cans and if needed the stocking of firewood for the kitchen stove. Clayton believed that on Sunday that man was meant to rest, as it was spoken of in the Good Book, but not all day, for there was too much work to be done, and idle hands only led to mischief and laziness.

     They had worked for two days on that old oak tree, with axe and saw, and now only the stump was left to be removed so as to make it easier to plow the ground. It had stood for as long as Henry could remember in its spot, but age and storms had finally finished it, his father disliked it anyway, he always complained that he had to make way for it and that it sucked too much of the moisture from the soil so that the crops wouldn’t grow near it, ‘a waste of good seed and money’, he would always say after planting that season’s crop, whether it was corn or wheat, depending on what his father thought would bring the best price in the fall.
     The late afternoon was spent clearing the limbs and branches away, dragging them towards the house just over the rise, stockpiled and ready for the axe to be made into firewood for the coming winter or fuel for the cook stove, Henry knew that it would be his job to cut the limbs to size and quarter them, then stack them in their rightful place, then again he would have to move them where they were needed, either beside the kitchen stove or nestled against the stone wall of the fireplace.
     He had grow cold to the ceaseless calls of the chores that had to be done, even now many of his friends near his own age of 16 that he had grown up with from farms around the area had already left, after hearing about the easy riches to be made panning for gold along the river banks near towns who’s names he had memorized out of the penny priced paper books he liked to read before he fell asleep. This was not the life he wanted, Henry wanted more than working the ground and battling the elements just to see everything repeat itself year after year, as soon as he was older, in a couple of more years he had plans to leave this place and head to California and strike it rich in the gold fields that he always read about in the papers at the feed store. But now he could only watch and wait.
                                                                            #
      Clayton finished preparing the hole under the oak stump, ready for the placement of the dynamite that he would use to blast the stump from its rooted grip on the brown earth. The stump with its coiled and thick roots had resisted all of Clayton and Henry’s efforts to remove it by axe and shovel, and even applying the force of Ole Ned tied to a rope had done little to move it, and now Clayton had decided to be done with this chore and rid himself of what he considered a blight on his farm field by the use of dynamite which would vanquish his foe and all that would be left would be to clean up the remains and level the ground once more for the seed. Clayton carefully opened the small wooden box which contained the dynamite, taking only one stick from the box of six, then cut the stick in half in slow easy strokes so as not to disrupt the nitroglycerin packed within the clay wrapping. Half a stick is what he reasoned would do the job, anymore and it would be a waste and the explosion would merely scatter fragmented remains hundreds of feet into the field now covered in stubble and make it harder to gather the shards of the oaken stump. Slowly he wrapped the remaining half in an old oil stained rag and wrapped it with fuse wire, then inserted a blasting cap into the end and placed it carefully into the hollow space he had created.
     “Boy, come here,” he called out.
     His father never called Henry ‘Henry’ but always Boy, it was just his way. He was not much for showing familiarity even to his own son. Clayton was a proud man raised on the hard work of the land and it was much easier to act as if all was business and emotions or feelings only added to the clutter on his daily life. Of Henry, he was very proud of what he had become and felt that he had grown into a fine young man, almost ready to strike out on his own, but there was still much that Clayton felt Henry had to learn and that life was not an easy journey, it was something that had to be plowed, reaped and hammered until it became the form it needed for one to survive. Life was no easy matter, not something to be taken lightly, life was to Clayton, a living breathing beast that had to be tamed, and Henry, so his father thought, had yet to learn that lesson.
     “Boy you had better move Ole Ned a little farther to the west, we don’t want him spooked by the explosion, or we’ll be chasing him all day,” commanded Clayton.
     Clayton packed dirt around the dynamite and climbed out of the stump hole, unwinding the fuse line from its roll as he backed up towards where Henry and Ole Ned waited. Clayton and Henry gathered behind the wagon, kneeling on the ground as Clayton cut the fuse cord to its final length and prepared the light it.
     “Did you set the hand brake?”
     “Yes sir,” Henry replied.
     “Well get ready and cover your ears, things are going to get a mite loud,” Clayton commented as he leaned his back against the wagon wheel and lit the fuse.
     The fuse hissed and flashed as the spark snaked its way along the fuse. Henry resisted the urge to look over the wagon to see its journey towards the stump. The explosion was much louder then Henry had expected, it seemed like a thunder bolt had suddenly exploded overhead. The dynamite ripped through the old oaken stump tossing dirt and dust everywhere, pieces of rock and shredded wood landed all around the wagon. A shard of splintered oak struck Ole Ned in the hindquarters and he reared-up, his front legs kicking into the air jolting the hand brake loose, Ole Ned flailed at the air, his eyes black with fright and landed with a forceful thud, struggling against the wagon that kept him from fleeing, pulling the wagon forward. Clayton fell backwards and lay sprawled under the wagon, Ole Ned fought against the weight of the wagon jerking the wagon forward. It stopped only momentarily as it rolled onto the neck of Clayton, then rolled back, Ole Ned determined in his fight against the wagon, his hooves digging against the plowed ground, forced the wagon forward against and over Clayton’s body. Ole Ned galloped ahead, the wagon bounding after him. Henry rushed to his father, and knelt over his father stunned at what had just happened, Clayton’s neck was crushed and he groaned ‘Henry’. An erratic gurgling sound came from his father, then a frightened Henry raced back to his house to get his mother, maybe she would know what to do.
                                                                             #
     Henry walked silently beside his mother down the time worn path, his arm around her waist to comfort her as they walked away from his father’s resting place. Silence filled the wagon as they journeyed back home, his mother had placed an old blanket over her lap to protect the black dress she had to borrow from their neighbor Mrs. Runyan, from the dust stirred up as they went along the road. He didn’t much bother about the dust on his clothes, they were the best clothes he had, clothes that he wore for everyday chores and errands around the farm, but they were clean. In the distance he could see the black carriage parked in front of their house. The banker Mr. Moretis Owedmi was waiting for them to return, Henry had seen
Mr. Owedmi’s carriage many times parked in front of the bank and knew that Mr. Owedmi was visiting for only one reason, money. Henry thought it was cruel and insensitive that Mr. Owedmi would be bothering his mother on this day, although he had never talked to the man, this act of money lust caused him to dislike the man before he had even met him. As they pulled up to the house Mr. Owedmi took off his hat revealing his slicked back black hair and he smiled as he greeted them.
     “Good morning Mrs. McAlister, I’m sorry to hear about your loss,” said Mr. Owedmi in his peculiar Ohio accent, causing Henry to think of a prairie dog chirping a warning from its burrow.
     “Thank you Mr. Owedmi, it was so nice of you to show yourself at the gravesite, I’m sure Clayton would have appreciated it.” Henry’s mother, Sarah, said dryly without any emotion. “Henry take Ole Ned to the barn and see that he’s fed and groomed and tend to your chores as I talk to Mr. Owedmi. Mr. Owedmi let’s go inside where we can discuss matters a little more comfortable out of this sun.”
                                                                                #
     “Would you care for a glass of water Mr. Owedmi?”
     “That would be most kind of you Mrs. McAlister, it is rather a hot day. A dreadful thing, what happened to your husband. Tragic.”
     “Yes it was quite a shock for me and especially Henry. Now what brings you out here Mr. Owedmi?” Replied Sarah, knowing the answer she was about to receive.
     “I would like to extend the bank’s most sincere condolences for your loss, your husband was a valued customer for many years and always made the mortgage payments in a timely manner, however with his being gone, I’m sure you can understand that the president of the bank is somewhat concerned about your family’s financial situation and must protect its investment in this farm.”
     “My family’s finical situation is just fine Mr. Owedmi, the bank has nothing to worry about,” answered Sarah sitting down at the small table next to Mr. Owedmi.
     “I’m sure Mr. Avaricer will be glad to hear that, however there is the matter of the monthly mortgage payments.”
     “I have just buried my husband Mr. Owedmi, he hasn’t even been in the grave for a day, and you come to me worried about money. I think it is most improper to bring up such maters at this time. Surely the bank could of waited.”
     “No need to take offence Mrs. McAlister. You can understand the bank’s concern. After all it is a rather large debt,” said Mr. Owedmi, clearly embarrassed and apologetic for the task the bank president had sent him to do. “The president of the bank sent me to check on your well being and to see if you were aware of just how much your late husband owed.” Mr. Owedmi reached into his case and presented the loan papers to Sarah. “Everything is in order, I can assure you.”
     “I’m sure it is,” Sarah replied as she read through the mortgage papers. Sarah was surprised at the amount owed of nearly 320 dollars. “I had no idea it was so much.”
     “The bank will be expecting the mortgage payment as per usual at the first of the month, will that be satisfactory?”
     “I have barely had time to bury my husband and put my affairs in order. And you come to me asking for money!”
     “Now, now Mrs. McAlister, no need to get yourself riled up.”
     “Surely there’s something that can be done,” said Sarah, letting her hand slightly brush over Mr. Owedmi’s and placing it on the table touching his.
     “Well, well…in cases like this Mrs. McAlister, the bank can make some allowances. An extension can be made,” Mr. Owedmi noted, keeping his hand still.
     Sarah placed her hand on top his and gave it a gently squeeze, letting it rest on his.
     “I would be most grateful for anything you could do for me, I’m all alone here, with just Henry and myself, it has all been such a shock,” Sarah said quietly, her eyes beginning to water.
     “There, there Mrs. McAlister. I may be able to speak to the bank president on your behalf,” Mr. Owedmi said, cupping her hand in his.
     “You don’t know what it would mean to me to have a dear friend such as yourself to help me at this time. Can I get you something to eat? I have some freshly made apple jam.”
     “No thank you…Sarah …I really must be going,” said Mr. Owedmi, gathering his papers and returning them into his case. “Perhaps I could stop by again sometime and explain some of the financial matters with you.”
     “That would be most kind of you, you would be very welcome,” replied Sarah with a tense smile.
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                               To be continued.......leave a message if you what me to continue with the story...

IT LIVES.........

Honk honk…
Yes I still live,, thanks for asking…
It seems that the Emperor where I toil each day,,
chiseling away at the salt,, to be sold to the rich and mighty,,
has deemed it necessary to rebuild Jabba’s sail barge…And thus it
is that I,, along with the other hapless minions of workdom,,
have to work long into the moonless blackness to accomplish these new
tasks…So when I return to my resting spot under the bridge at 5th and Walbash,, my brain has turned into a throbbing mass of burnt lumpy mash potatoes,, rather than the slimy caldron of oatmeal that it normally is…I suggest that you enjoy the silence while it lasts…They say silence is golden,, too bad you can’t spend any of it…

Till the raven once more knocks apon my door…

THE GUARD TOWER.............

THE GUARD TOWER……………….
Watch him now,, how many steps does he take,,
….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,
Not much time for me to make a dash,,
Get below the tower,, then cut the wire,,
Then to the trees and I’ll be free,,
Quiet now,, here comes the dog and the sentry,,
Quiet now,, stay in the shadows,, wait till he goes by,,

Watch him now,, how many steps does he take,,
….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,
Careful now,, stay out of the searchlight,,
Get ready to make the dash… Run now to the tower,,
Wait,, wait,, be silent now,, hear the footsteps,,
Where is he at,, how many steps was that,,
Snip, snip,, cut one wire,, snip, snip,, cut the other,,
Wait,, wait,, be silent now,, hear the guard on the tower,,
Snip, snip,, cut one wire,, snip, snip,, cut the other,,
All four wires cut,, now to make my dash,,

Listen now,, how many steps does he take,,
….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,
Get ready to make the dash… Run now to the trees,,
Rata-tat-tat,, Rata-tat-tat,, Rata-tat-tat,, shot in the back,,
“damn,, I hate this game,, that’s the 12th time I’ve been caught”,,
“Lets reboot it again,, maybe this time,, I can make the trees”,,

Watch him now,, how many steps does he take,,
….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,….6, 7, 8,, then about face,,
Not much time for me to make a dash …………………..

LAWN MOWER FUN.............

LAWNMOWER FUN………………..
Just the other day,, yes it was a Tuesday,, I was caught in a vicious cyclotron of gibber-jabber with a fellow Blogger…I wouldn’t mention Drowsey’s name cuz it would only encourage her?,, to come by again and keep me up till way past my bedtime,, which is 8:30…Lucky for her that day
I had been fortifying myself with my favorite liquid refreshment since arriving home from the toxic wasteland that I call work…She’s good at gibber-jabbering,, mostly about herself and she managed to keep me up until the wee hours of the morning,, 11:30…I’m old and haven’t seen the moonlight side of 11:30,, since 1982,, when I was playing hide the pickle with Helga in the back seat of my Chevy Nova…Well anyway,, we got to discussing why I haven’t posted much,, and I told her it’s because I’ve run out of ideas…She expressed a lot of happiness about that and then
suggested that I write about what happened to me during the week…So in order to get this BlogBuggy moving again I’ll try it…It’s kind of boring around here,, since I’m out of rocket launchers and my neighbors are away…So now’s your chance to escape……..

It all started last Saturday when I was hired by an old man and a young kid to drive them to Alderaan so they could deliver a secret message to some princess or something…
….oops wrong story…

It all started last Saturday when the right front ball joint broke loose on my lawnmower and the steering went kaput…For you that don’t know,, it’s kind of hard to steer when the stabilizer to the front wheel falls off…So I popped it back into place and used lots and lots of the handyman’s best friend as a quick fix,, until I could get around to getting a replacement part…That didn’t work so well,, within 50 feet the duct tape came loose and I drove into a tree…Now I know what your thinking,, that I normally drive that way,, but your wrong…It’s a good thing I wasn’t hurt cuz I was zooming right along at a whopping 2 miles an hour…Well that brought by lawn mowing to a halt until I could get a new part…Luckily for me I found a parts store in the phone book,,
about 2 hrs later I drove into the phone book,, I mean I drove the 35 miles over to the store and picked up the replacement part…I got two…Because this basket case isn’t as stupid as you think…If one is worn and falls off then the other one is about to,, since they have been on the mower for exactly the same time and doing exactly the same job…Didn’t think I knew that did you?...My little excursion into town lasted about four hours,, mainly because I stopped at Bob’s Big Bottle-O-Beer Emporium to have a bowl of stale popcorn…The whole trip cost me about $78.95,, $35.75 for the parts,, gas for the guzzler and a coke with two bags of chips…It didn’t cost me anything at Bob’s…He just put it on my tab…I like Bob…

I spent the next hour putting the replacement parts on…It was a lot of fun,, lying on the dirt surface of the garage’s concrete floor,, dripping with sweat like a boat that had just ran aground…It was 95 degrees with a humidity of 120 %...Yeah I know,, humidity can’t get above 99.9% or it’s rain…I guess you don’t live in cornstalkland like I do,, or you’d know different…
Well since I was already caked with wet dirt and my shirt was nicely stuck to my 6 pack abs with my jeans glued to my bulging thigh muscles,, I decided to take the lawnmower deck off and sharpen the mower blades…It’s something I’ve been putting off for 3 years,, but now that I was already sticky,, smelly,, and sweaty,, I figured I’d just go ahead and do it…I was feeling extra brave that day…

I had already found the owners manual so I was all set…It took me a while to find the correct page of instructions because I had to find the pages that were written in English…Damn manual had pages written in French,, German,, Dutch,, Tagalog,, Chinese,, and American Indian smoke signals…I found the section where it described how to remove the mower deck,, it was on page 287,, luckily for me it had a couple of nice illustrations on what to do…Unluckily for me,, I had no idea what they were taking about…What the hell is a deck support pin?,, and where is it?…Crap there are two of them…Which one of the 3 belts is the PTO belt? and how do you remove it from the pulley system?…And when they are talking about the right side of the mower,, what do they mean?...Am I sitting in the chair and the right side is to my right,, or am I standing in front of the mower and now the right side is on the other side…This is why I put the whole damn thing off for 3 years…

After about an hour of shuffling back and forth while lying on the garage floor,, trying to work under the mower and find where everything was hidden,, I finally achieved success…And I only scraped up 4 knuckles and stripped 2 bolts…The mower deck was now free from the entrapments of the mower…I immediately congratulated myself and took a 3 beer break,, with the required half-pack of cigarettes…
Note to all would be garage mechanics: sweep the garage floor before you begin,, this gets rid of those pesky little rocks that always end up under your knee while your crawling around on the concrete floor,, I found 6 of them…

After successfully taking a break,, I proceeded to pull the mower deck out from under the mower,, you do this from the passenger side…huh?...My mower is a 1 seater…The next task was to turn the mower deck over so I could get at the blades and take them off,, not an easy job when your dealing with a contraption of metal with bolts and pulleys and belts hanging all over the place,, and it’s on wheels,, so it tends to slide around a little (lot) while your trying to lift it up and over…Note to self: Get off the couch more lardbutt…

Success,, the mower deck is now on its back,, looking like a horror film death machine…Even tho it’s not hooked up I know that any minute now the blades are going to start spinning and try to chop me up into little pieces…For you that don’t know,, the blades are held in place by nuts,, big nuts (no not that kind)…Next I went to my workbench and gathered up 17 of the biggest wrenches I could find,, which took about 15 minutes,, because I have a bad habit of never pulling anything back where it belongs,, mainly on those little hooks that are for hanging tools,, and I grabbed a 2 pound hammer and a can of WD-40…

As the sweat poured off my forehead into my eyes,, and was dripping like a leaky faucet from the end of my nose,, I decided to take another break,, no sense in rushing,, after all it has waited 3 years for me to do this,, so another 15 minutes won’t matter…

My break only lasted 10 minutes,, mainly because I ran out of beer,, so it was,, that I decided to drive up to the little gas station in town and pick up some more liquid refreshment and cigarettes…Now as some of you might know,, I live in a small town in the middle of nowhere surrounded by miles and miles of cornstalks,, so going to the store looking like a hog farmer that had just wallowed in the mud with bovine is perfectly OK,, nobody notices,, it’s completely normal,, so normal in fact that when somebody is seen in a clean shirt and jeans,, everybody asks if they’ve been to a funeral…

Now I’m all set,, I have my beer,, my cigarettes,, 2 bags of chips and a pile of assorted wrenches…The thing I don’t like about working with mechanical objects is the fact that you never know what size wrench to use,, is the nut ‘Euro-metric’ or Good ole American size,, I had to test everyone of my wrenches to find out which one was the correct one,, and yes it was the last one in the pile…Fun stuff…With that monumental chore out of the way I was well on my way to success,, after all there were only 3 nuts to remove and there was still 6 hours of daylight left…
I liberally sprayed them with WD-40,, by liberally I mean I used the whole can on 3 nuts…The thing about nuts and bolts is that they tend to magically weld themselves together,, it’s called rust,, and this is especially true when the nut is under a mover getting covered with wet grass clipping and hasn’t been touched in 5 years,, no longer shiny and new but rather looking like something that had been lying on the bottom of the ocean…

Time to take a break and let the WD-40 do its stuff and to read the owners manual again,, just in case it had some hidden information that I might need…It didn’t…I was hoping it would tell me which way to turn the nuts in order to remove them…For those of you who don’t know,, threaded bolts come in 2 different types,, clockwise threads and counter-clockwise treads,, it’s nice to know what type of bolt you have so that you don’t tighten the nut instead of loosing it…On nuts and bolts that are holding spinning objects,, mower blades for instance,, sometimes the treads are counter-clockwise,, which is not normal,, the designers at the factories like to do this to confuse everybody and to have a laugh while having lunch…Well luckily for me I had only two choices,, clockwise or counter-clockwise to remove the nut,, a 50% chance of being right,, I chose counter-clockwise…

Following the instructions in the manual I placed a large hunk of wood between the mower housing and the blade,, this keeps it from spinning while your trying to remove the nut,, I put the proper wrench on the nut,, stepped on the nut to hold the wrench in place and whacked the end of the wrench with the aforementioned 2 lb hammer,, twice,, success,, the nut moved and soon I had all 3 nuts removed and all 3 blades off the mower deck…The Gods must have been feeling sorry for me that day,, usually they just laugh a lot…
Next I took them over to the bench grinder I have and sharpened the blades as best I could,, they were now shiny and sharper than my wit…Since the Sun was starting to slowly descend over the septic tank and the kamikaze mosquitoes were starting to dive bomb me,, I decided to put off re-assembling everything until the next day…After all I was only half way thru,, and I wanted to have lots of time to screw things up…

The next day arrived with a clear blue sky and not an alien UFO in sight…After consuming 14 cups of java juice and putting on the same dirty stinky clothes that I wore yesterday,, which by the way were now stiffer than Captain Ahab’s wooden leg,, I went out into the garage to complete my task,, all while humming a happy tune…I lie…At 9:30 it was already 94 degrees with 110% humidity and there was a chance of rain…Oh,, boy…Within 5 minutes my clothes were stuck to me again using that wonderful human invention,, sweat…The first task before me was to put the masterfully sharpened blades back on the mower deck…I did this by working in reverse order of how I took them off,, blade on bolt,, nut,, large piece of wood,, large wrench,, foot on wrench and smack the wrench with the 2 lb hammer... Success,, 3 blades on,, the mower deck turned over and positioned under the mower,, ready to hook up all the bolts,, nuts,, pins and belts back onto the mower,, and not once did I scrape a knuckle…I rewarded myself by having a beer,, some cigarettes and a half bag of soggy chips…

Now the really fun part begins,, I get to crawl around on the concrete garage floor again…I figured that the best thing to do was to hook up everything in the reverse order that I removed them with…This didn’t work so well,, namely because of something called gravity…The mower deck has to be attached to the mower before you can re-attach the PTO belt,, whatever that’s for,, I would have left the PTO belt off,, but I thought it might have something to do with making the blades spin,, having mower blades spinning while mowing the yard is a good thing,, so I figured it had to go back on…You get to have the fun of re-attaching the mower deck to the mower by lifting the mower deck up high enough so that you can slide what’s called ‘support pins’ into properly aligned pre-drilled holes,, it should be noted at this point that it is humanly impossible to lift a 2 million pound mower deck with one hand and with the other hand try to slide the ‘support pin’ into the pre-drilled holes,, all while lying on your side trying to work under the mower,, which has only about a 3 inch clearance,, can’t be done…So I consulted with the owners manual once again,, maybe they left a clue as to how to do it,, I was of course dreaming,,
I even read the pages written in Tagalog,, no help there…

So I was left to my own resources to figure out how to lift the mower deck and replace the ‘support pins’ at the same time…Not a good idea,, as many of you know who have been here once or twice,, leaving me to my own resources is not a good idea and things quickly get bloody,, normally with lots of Hungarian dwarfs being roasted and toasted,, unfortunately for me,, I didn’t have any dwarfs in the freezer…
After about 20 minutes of spinning the grey matter in my skull and cooling it off with a couple of beers I came up with a elegantly simple solution,, I’d raise the mower deck off the floor using pieces of wood,, elegant and simple… Unfortunately for me,, I didn’t have the correct thickness’ of wood to raise the deck to the proper height so that I could slide the ‘support pins’ into the pre-drilled holes,, the mower deck was still too low…Next came the solution of using a pry bar to lift the mower deck even higher,, I’m good at using a pry bar,, mostly at night,, it was kind of odd using one when the sun was still shinning…

After about 10 minutes of lifting the mower deck with the pry bar and wiggling it just so,, to align the pre-drilled holes up,, I was successful with re-installing the ‘support pins’…A quick note to anyone out there that might be thinking of using this same technique on their mower,, “DO NOT LET THE PRY BAR SLIP”,, otherwise you end up crushing your knuckles between the concrete garage floor and the pry bar,, this happened to me 3 times,, nuff said,, lesson learned,, lets move on…

The next step in this badly planned Normandy invasion was to re-install the PTO belt around 2 pulleys and between 2 guide bars all while lying on your side using only 1 hand…The PTO belt winds around the pulleys that are suspended from the mower in a convoluted serpentine manner…This is not a task that anyone with a quick temper should try…How do you tread a 3/8 inch thick PTO belt around two pulleys and thru a gap only ¼ inch wide?,, the math says it can’t be done,, and it can’t,, unless you do like I did and use the largest screw driver you have to pry the pulleys apart just long enough to push the PTO belt between the pulleys…Remember what it feels like to be sitting in a dentist chair with the dentist and his assistant having their hands in your mouth along with the dental tools,, well that’s kind of what it’s like trying to put the PTO belt back on,, 2 hands,, a large screwdriver,, a PTO belt,, pulleys,, guide bars and misc sharp metal objects all in a space no bigger than a beer can…I was lucky to be able to put the PTO belt back on with only slicing open 1 finger and scraping 3 knuckles…

Time to take a break and have a beer,, both to replace the 8 lbs of fluid I had sweated and for medical reasons,, beer,, as some of you might know contains alcohol and is useful for
sterilizing open wounds,, but doing so is a waste of the brewers art…Well thinking that I had completed my mission impossible of re-attaching the mower deck and would be able to mow the yard,, I did one last check of the mower deck just to make sure I didn’t miss anything…Oops…I forgot to re-install 1 very important object at the front of the mower deck,, it’s called a ‘deck stabilizer bar’,, it holds the mower deck off the ground so that you can mow rather than plow…
It should have been re-attached first…Oops…Not wanting to repeat my earlier exploits of mower repair,, I looked for some way to take the ‘deck stabilizer bar’ off the mower,, put it in the proper slot on the mower deck and then re-attach the whole contraption…Luckily for me the ‘deck stabilizer bar’ is attached to the mower with ‘cotter pins’,, which are kind of like hair pins,, 1 leg is straight and the other is bent,, and it’s treaded thru a hole in a bolt…They are supposed to be easy to remove just with your fingers,, these were not,, they were wedged into such a tight spot under the mower that it was impossible to remove them,, so it was necessary to grab them with a pair of pliers and yank them out,, using an ordinary sized pliers was also impossible…I love how design engineers think about the end user when putting things together,, THEY DON’T…Thus I had to find a pair of needle nose pliers,, needle nosed pliers were specifically developed just because of design engineers…They were invented by Clyde Snoogers from Hoboken,, New Jursey,, in 1908,, it’s the only good thing that has ever come out of Hoboken…
See you learn something new every day when you read my Blog,, now you can impress your friends with your knowledge of where needle nosed pliers came from…

I successfully removed the ‘cotter pins’,, the holding pins and the ‘deck stabilizer bar’ dropped free from the mower…I then put the ‘deck stabilizer bar’ in the proper slots on the mower deck and proceeded to re-install the ‘deck stabilizer bar’ to its previous position…This is where the wood blocks came in handy again,, I wedged them under the mower deck to raise it high enough so that the bolt holes in the ‘deck stabilizer bar’ would be about the same height as the ones under the front of the mower…The holes of course didn’t quite line up,, so with one hand I grabbed the mower deck and pulled it forward and with the other hand I tried to put the holding pin thru the holes,, I did this all while lying on the concrete floor with my head wedged under the front grille and next to the front tire…Fun,, fun…I had to do it twice,, once for the right side and once for the left side…A miracle then occurred,, I got both pins into their proper places and also put the “cotter pins’ back in place…It only took 20 minutes…It should be noted at this time that when you have your head wedged under a piece of equipment,, that you should not raise your head quickly…Please learn from my mistake…

Time for a break,, more beer and some cigarettes…Now I think I’m done…One more look around under the mower and it’s time for a test mow…I move all my tools out of the way,, start the mower and slowly back it out of the garage,, I only ran over two beer cans,, don’t worry I can still get my 5 cents deposit from them…I mow the front yard for about 15 minutes just to see if everything worked and nothing fell off or exploded…The newly sharpened blades cut the grass just right,, much better than before…But I don’t expect them to stay sharp for very long,, because when you mow over fallen tree branches and pink bunnies hiding in the grass it tends to dull the blades…Damn bunnies…So I expect to be repeating the whole operation again in another 5 years or so…I’m looking forward to it…

As I was cleaning up the mess I made in the garage and putting my tools back on my work bench,, I found 2 bolts,, a washer,, a nut that didn’t fit the bolts and a spring…I have no idea where they came from,, but I think they were left over from when I was assembling my rocket launchers in my garage…Pesky neighbors…

The above story illustrates why I don’t do repairs on mechanical objects unless I really, really, really have to…I’d rather shell out the money to watch someone else have the fun of doing it…My lawn mower repair job cost me $78.95,, took 1 ½ days,, I consumed 37 beers,, 6 bags of chips,, smoked 4 packs of cigarettes and I have to take antibiotics for the infected cut on my finger…The good news is that now when I run over pink bunnies hiding in the grass they are chopped up into smaller pieces and I lost 4 lbs from water loss…

In next weeks story from nightmare repairland,, learn how a Sears repair man got away with $68.75 of my money for 2 ½ minutes of non-work on my non-working upright freezer……..

Special editors note:
My devilness that was a loooong story…You know why I write loooong stories?...It’s because it annoys people,, and when I annoy people,, I get a woody….pppplllltttthhhh…

THE HOUSE.....without commercials

Good evening ladies and gentlemen…
Tonight’s tale is a short story,, concerning
the lives of Dave and Melody Lunder…This
story is not for the squeamish and should only be read
during the day and never when you are alone…
I apologize for any inconvenient you may have while
running through your yard screaming…..

THE HOUSE…………..

“Melody,, I’m home”…yelled Dave Lunder as he closed the door to the apartment…
“Melody?”…
“I’m in the bedroom”…replied Melody…
Dave put down his briefcase and walked the few feet into the master bedroom of their two bedroom apartment…An apartment filled with furniture and personal belongings…The spare bedroom was also crowded,, with Melody’s potters wheel and small electric kiln…The spare room was brightly painted pink with images of animals and faerie creatures hand painted on the walls,, a reminder of what could have been…A small crib,, clothing and stuffed animals were lovingly tucked away in the bedroom closet…It was almost two years ago that Melody had the miscarriage,, she was finally coming to terms with the fact that their baby had died…She was becoming more and more like the woman that Dave had married just five years ago…
“Hey,, sorry I’m late”…”What’re you doing?”…
“Hi hun,, just putting away some laundry”…”How’d work go?”…replied Melody as she stood near the bed,, folding clothes and placing then into various piles…Melody Lunder was four years younger than Dave,, a blonde haired young woman of twenty-three…A woman that men would wink at as she walked down the street,, she wasn’t a classical beauty,, she was more of a natural beauty and rarely needed to crown her looks with make-up…Her golden shoulder length hair tied into a ponytail,, almost a ritual practice of hers when she was alone in the apartment or working with her potters wheel…
“Have you eaten?”...asked Dave
“No,, I just put the oven on warm since you called”…
“You should have eaten something,, you know what the doctor has said about your eating at regular times,, its almost 7:30 now”…
“Well,, I wanted to eat with you,, I never get to see you anymore since you’ve been working overtime at that damn office of yours”…”I just need someone to talk too”…
“Now Melody lets not bring that up again,, you know I have to work long hours if I’m to get ahead…now come on lets have some dinner”…
As Melody went into the kitchen to get their dinner from the oven…Dave changed into jeans and his college T-shirt,, it had been a long week of work and overtime…
“Do you remember Bob Synder?”…
“Yeah I think so,, is he the red haired guy from your office?”...
“Well,, kind of”…”He was the office manager for one of our branch offices over in New Castle”…
“Yeah,, what about him?”…
“He resigned last week and took a job with Randolph Mantin downtown”…
“I remember him now,, isn’t he the one that was always trying to show you up in front of your boss?”…
“That’s right,, a little weasel…talked too much if you ask me”…”We went over to his house last year for a Christmas party”…
“Ha, ha,, I hope he got the wine out of his carpet that I spilled”…”His wife was kind of nice”…”What are they going to do about New Castle?”…
“From what I hear they have already asked someone to
take over his position”…Dave said with a slight smile on his face…”I hear they have asked a handsome young man about my age,, who is married to the most beautiful woman in Pittsburgh”…
“That didn’t take them long,, you should of gotten that job”…”You put in more hours then anyone else,, and you did a wonderful job on the Clanton Farms case”…
“So you think I should take it?”…Dave smiled as he waited for his wife’s reaction…
Melody cut up another piece of the roast on her plate,, seeming not to have heard Dave,, then she dropped her folk onto the plate…
“Dave…you mean you got the job?”…
“I haven’t given them my answer yet,, I said I’d have to talk it over with you first”…
“Oh Dave,, take it”…Melody leaned over the table and hugged her husband then kissed him excitedly…
“I don’t know…it means a promotion,, more money,, and we’d have to move out of this apartment”…Dave said teasing his wife…
“Dave,, you call them up right now and say you’ll take it!”…
“Ha,, ha…I can’t…it’s Friday night and no one will be there
until Monday…Ha,, ha”…
“You rat”…

Dave laid in bed reading some of the depositions he had brought home,, Melody laid beside him reading a true romance novel…After 40 minutes of studying Dave put his papers back into his briefcase,, placing it on the floor beside him,, then tuned towards Melody…Resting his head for a few moments on his hand he then gently closed Melody’s book and moved closer to her,, giving her a gentle kiss on her cheek and slowly kissed her on her lips…Melody didn’t resist as Dave’s left hand cupped her breast…their tongues met and Melody whimpered a little as Dave moved his hand under her T-shirt and began to squeeze her firm breasts,, twirling he nipple between his thumb and forefinger…Dave’s hand moved down Melody’s stomach and towards her slightly parted legs…She stopped his hand from going any lower…
“Its been over two years,, since we lost our child,, and now that I’ve gotten that promotion things will be better and we will be able to afford the things we want…and start a family”…Dave said as he kissed her lips again…
Melody said nothing as she moved closer to him,, letting go of his hand…Dave’s hand continued down to between her legs as they pressed closer and closer…

“Want some breakfast?”…
“Where’s the coffee?”…replied Melody…
“Where it usually is…I was going to let you sleep in”…
“That damn cat started pawing on the top of my head”…
“Ha ha,, she is your cat”…Dave said as he started to cook some eggs for his breakfast…
“I’ve been thinking about our move to New castle,, we should look for a house instead of another apartment,, I didn’t tell you that the company is giving me a $10,000 bonus and they are going to pay the moving expenses”…"$10,000 and part of our savings will make a great down payment”…
“Oh Dave that would be wonderful…it’s what we have always dreamed of”…”Get out of my kitchen,, I’ll cook the breakfast,, you make a great cup of coffee but you’re a terrible cook”…

Melody sat at the computer,, scanning thru the real estate ads of New Castle reality companies…Looking for a suitable new home for her and Dave…Dave was over at the dinning table reading more of the depositions of the case he was working on…Now that Dave had received his big promotion she was looking for a place where they could get a fresh start and perhaps start a family…Dave just left the matter of finding a new home to her,, he really wasn’t interested in the finer details of their new place,, all he knew was that with his new job responsibilities he would still be working a lot of overtime,, at least for the first year or so,, until things got established…

“Dave I’ve been at this for hours,, I can’t seem to find anything that I want in New Castle”…”It’s just the same old houses,, they all look the same...I want something with character than we can be proud of”…”You know like those old houses on Brutan St”…
“I don’t know how I can help you”…”Have you looked at the surrounding area?”…replied Dave barely looking up from his paperwork…
“Yes,, there’s a couple of houses in Grove City that look about right,, but the ads are kind of old”…
“Why don’t you give them a call and ask them what’s available”…”How far is Grove City from New Castle?”...
“About 15 miles on Route 58…the ad doesn’t give a phone number,, maybe we could drive over there next Saturday and have a look around”…”There’s even a small College there that maybe I can take some classes at”…
“uh huh”…
“Dave!...are you paying attention to anything I’ve said”…
“Sure hun”…”We’ll plan on going over there next Saturday”… “We’ll make a day of it”…”But I think you should get the number of the real estate office to make an appointment”…


Melody was excited to be going over to Gove city,, just 50 miles from Pittsburgh…She had made arrangements with Lisa Yaleman of the Yaleman realty company to meet there at about 10:00 so Lisa could show Dave and Melody some properties they might like…Dave sat silently while driving down the highway,, his mind already working on what he would have to do in his new position as office manager to get the New Castle office running as efficiently as it should…
It was a big responsibility that was handed to him,, he just hoped that he was up to it,, he had no real management training but he somehow always seemed to be leading his
team of lawyers on whatever case they were given…

They left just a little early so that they could cruise around the town to see what was there,, even though Grove City was just a short drive from New Castle and Pittsburgh,, none of Dave’s or Melody’s friends could tell them much about the town…It seemed that everybody had heard of it but nobody had ever been there…Route 58 was a two lane blacktop that curved thought what looked to be almost untouched forest,, the trees where in full bloom and added to the picturesque scene that rolled by the cars windows…The road was well maintained and would be an easy drive to New Castle during the winter thought Dave…Things changed slightly as they got nearer and nearer to Grove City,, the trees had more dead limbs in them and the leaves didn’t seem to be as colorful,, the colors all seemed just a little faded…The road abruptly changed near a sign that read Grove City pop. 875… Its face was faded and streaked with brown stains,, bullet holes let the sunshine thru…The road was no longer a well maintained path through the trees,, it had numerous potholes and cracks in it and the sides were sometimes washed out with 3 foot high weeds growing through the gravel edges,, the painted lines were all but gone,, just fragments left on the road…As they passed the city sign Dave noticed an old man and his dog just standing near the tree line,, as if he knew they were coming…

“Dave!!,, look out”…shouted Melody as they rounded a bend in the road…
Dave slammed on the brakes causing the rear end of the car to skid sideways,, the car came to a stop only a few feet from the dog that was crossing the road…It appeared to be the same dog that Dave had seen just minutes before,, its coat glistened in the sunlight and its rear leg was bent at an odd angle…It looked back at the car,, baring its teeth and then disappeared into the woods…
“Did you see that?”...”I swear that dog came right out in front of us on purpose”...said an enraged Dave...
“It scared me to death,, I didn’t even see it until it was right
in front of us”…Melody replied,, her hands tightly gripped on her seatbelt…
Dave was anxious now to get to the town,, awakened from his daydreaming about work…He was curious about what the town would be like…

The town of Grove City was like most other small towns,, Route 58 passed through the center,, with older brick stores and building on main street…Every building looked as if they hadn’t had any work done to modernize them or to dress up their looks,, each one needed some repairs and
a couple of coats of fresh paint,, all except the hardware store on the east side which had just recently had a new sign put up,, the faded outlines of where the older sign had been could clearly be seen…
“Well at least there isn’t much traffic”…Dave said amused,,
“And they don’t have any parking meters”…”Looks kind of dead thro,, only the two cars at the bank”…”Have you seen the Reality office?”…
“Well it’s still early,, maybe everyone is still at home”…”Ohh there it is”…
“Where?”…
“Over there,, next to the gas station,, it’s that white house with the picket fence in front”…”See the sign?”…
“Yeah I see it”…haven’t these people ever heard of paint?”… “Well,, you ready to go in?”…
“Not yet,, we still have a little time”…replied Melody after looking at her watch…”Lets find the college and see what it looks like”…
“OK,, uhh,, where is it?”…
It’s supposed to be on E. Main St”…
“I think we’re on Main St…must be farther ahead”…

The small college of Grove City was a sprawling complex of multistory buildings,, most of them appeared to have the same red brick and limestone exteriors in a federal style of architecture…Three large 4 story structures on the western edge of the campus seemed to be dormitories for the students…The campus area was well maintained with full grown oak and maples dotting the landscape…Since it was the beginning of summer,, Dave and Melody didn’t see anyone of campus…
“Well the college seems to be real nice”…commented Dave
“I like it,, it reminds me of a campus you’d see on a postcard,, I hope they offer night classes…or maybe I could just take some adult non-credit courses”…
“Hey,, take it easy”…ha ha…”We don’t live here yet”…Dave teased his wife…
“Ohh look Dave,, isn’t that sad?”...
Melody directed Dave to look at the burnt out remains of an old church on campus,, blackened remains of the outer walls and a part of the steeple laying on the ground were all that was left…
“There’s another burnt out church across the street”…
“I guess someone doesn’t like churches”…
“We had better head back for our meeting with that Yaleman lady”…
“Her name is Lisa,, and you be nice”…”Remember she’s trying to help us”…
“Well I’m sure she’s going to make her money”…”I’m not sure there’s much around here that your going to like”…
“I liked the campus didn’t I?”...
“Are you going to live in one of the dorms with all the hot freshman college hunks?”…said Dave as he smiled…
“I may just do that,, who knows they might like ‘older’ women”…
“I like ‘older’ women”…

Dave parked his Jeep next to the curb in front of the unkempt white picket fence that framed the front yard of the small white house that had the sign of Yaleman Realty in the front yard…The grass appeared to need to be mowed again and any flowers that had been planted in the spring were all now lost from view in the weeds…A small rusting wind chime hung from the porch eave…Dave and Melody waited on the front porch for someone to answer the doorbell,, Dave wasn’t even sure that it worked…Dave looked over to the gas station that was next door,, in the darkened doorway he could see an old man dressed in worn dusty jeans standing in the shadows,, watching them,, an old dog with only three good legs came out and sniffed the air,, then it looked over towards Dave and Melody baring its teeth…
“Oh hello hello,, come in come in”…said Lisa Yaleman,, a stout little woman of about 5’-2”,, see was easily 60lbs overweight for her size and had jet black hair,, but the most striking thing about her was her pale blues eyes…Dave thought she must be in her middle thirties…”I’m sorry I didn’t answer the doorbell right away,, I was in the back on the telephone…come in come in”…”I’m Lisa”…

Dave and Melody walked into the front room that was now the office for Yaleman Realty,, a single desk with 3 small chairs in the front took up most of the space,, an old Philco TV sat on the corner of the desk,, which was strewn with papers and photo books…Dave and Melody each sat down in one on the chairs…As Dave looked around the makeshift office he noticed photos on the wall with red stamped ‘SOLD’ on the photo,, they all appeared to be at least 15 years old…At the back of the house he could see the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes…
“My-o-my it certainly is good to have such a nice young couple visit our little town,, you must be Melody,, we talked on the phone last week,, and you must be…Dave,, is that right?”...
Dave just nodded as he listened to her sales pitch…
“Well we don’t get many young folks wanting to buy a house around here,, most people just drive on thru and go to New Castle”…”It’s a little more up to date then we are”…
“But I do have a couple of really nice houses you might be
interested in”…”They’re slightly older homes but their nice and clean and have all the modern conveniences”…”We don’t have any new construction in Grove City,, we’re just a small town,, sometimes I think time has passed us by”…
“That’s what we’re looking for,, a nice small town with charm and friendly neighbors that we can get to know”…”We want to be part of the town”…”We want to find an older type home,, that has some character,, where we can raise our family”…said Melody…
“Oh,, do you have kids?”…
“Not yet,, but we’re trying”…
“Kids are nice,, you can just eat em up can’t you?”...”They make everything worth it,, don’t they?”...
“Yes they do”…
“Well I’ve got three houses lined up for you to see,, would you like to go now?...
“That sounds like a great idea”…”We can take my car if you’d like”…replied Dave…
“Oh that would be just fine,, just fine,, mine’s a little small and sometimes it doesn’t run so good”…
As Dave,, Melody and Lisa were leaving,, Dave whispered to Melody…”Looks to me like she’s already eaten a couple of kids”…
Melody giggled quietly…

2 ½ hours later they returned to Lisa Yaleman’s Reality office…None of the houses that Dave and Melody had seen interested them…They were either too small or just didn’t fit into the dream house that Melody had in her mind…At one of the houses it was so packed with old furniture that they could barely see the walls…
“I’m sorry that I couldn’t find you something you liked”…
Lisa said apologetically…”It’s like I said we’re just a small town,, not much here really”…
“That’s all right”…said Dave as they were standing near his car…”It was a nice day to get out of town,, we’ll just have to keep on looking”…”Sorry to waste your time”…
“No trouble at all,, no trouble at all”…”It would have been nice to have you”…
As Dave and Melody started to drive away.. Lisa yelled after them…
“Wait a minute,, wait”…
Dave stopped the car while Melody lowered the window,, Lisa poked her pudgy face in and spoke excitedly to them…
“I just remembered… there is one other house I could show you”…
“Is it like the other ones?”…”We really should be going”…said Dave…
“No,, no wait,, it’s an older style house”…”No one has lived there for a couple of years,, it used to be the grandest house in town…it’s only 5 minutes from here”…
Dave looked at Melody and shrugged his shoulders…
“OK,, get in”…
“Just wait here,, I have to get the folder,, I’ll be right back,,
just a minute”…”Just a minute”…
“Well why not?,, we’re here anyway,, we’ll just stop somewhere for dinner afterwards…how’s that sound?”...
“Sounds OK,, we still have time,, and I’ll get a dinner out of you”…smiled Melody…

“Turn here turn here”…Lisa shouted as Dave drove down the blacktop heading north out of town,, Dave missed the gravel turn off and had to make a hard u-turn on the narrow road…The gravel driveway to the house was overgrown with weeds and potholes made for a bumpy ride as they drove deeper into the woods…A turn to the left led them to the front of the house Lisa had told them about…Dave parked near what used to be a curved brick walk with landscaped bushes on either side…Now all overgrown,, weed filled and looking like shaggy clumps of green and brown broken twigs…The front lawn area must have recently been mowed for the grass was only 5 inches tall…

The old three story Victorian house stood silhouetted against the backdrop of trees,, its brick exterior seemed to be made of the same colored brick that Dave and Melody saw at the college…Its wrap-around front porch was still there but it was in grim need of repairs with the posts and filigree molding missing most of their decorations…A large oak branch laid on the roof next to turret structure,, with a branch poking into the main roof…All the windows were intact,, except the large one over the front door on the second floor,, it must have been broken from the inside because glass pieces still remained on the porch roof,, reflecting the late day sun…All the wood trim needed to be scrapped and repainted,, maybe even replaced…The turret with its fancy wood shingle work needed the most repair,, its wood shingles of siding hung in scattered pieces on every side…The foundation walls were still intact,, at least it stood on well built stone and brick walls…Slightly to the right in the back stood an old carriage house,, its double doors stood open…The wooden structure half hidden in weeds and creeping vines…An old car could be seen inside with its rusting bumper hanging towards the ground…

“It’s not much to look at from the outside,, it needs a little repair work…But the inside is still in wonderful condition,, with all the original woodwork…Its barely been changed on the inside from when its was first built…Like I said it needs some work but it used to be the grandest house in town”…
Lisa said trying to sound as enthusiastic as possible…”Come on come on lets go inside,, I’m sure you’ll see…I have the key here someplace”…Lisa searched thru her handbag,, spilling misc papers and a rusty key ring onto the ground…
“Oh,, there they are”…Lisa bent over to retrieve her papers and the keys,, she let out a slight giggle as she did so…“Here Dave”…she said as she handed the rusty keys to him…”You better do it,, the door is heavy and it sometimes sticks”…
“Which one is it?”…asked Dave as he looked at the key ring with its five keys…
“Ohh,, ohh,, it’s the big key”…
A skeleton key of course,, thought Dave…
After unlocking the door,, Dave had to push it open using his shoulder,, as the hinges creaked their defiance the paneled oaken door finally gave way…The front parlor was gloomy and dark as they entered…Lisa pushed the top button on one of the old fashioned light switches and the entry chandelier sparkled and gave a warm glow to the room…The room was empty except for 2 small tables pushed against the wall…In front of them was the grand staircase,, its walnut spindles and railing winding their way up to the second floor…The entry parlor floor was black and white marble tiles,, set in a diagonal checkerboard pattern thru-out the room…Dry leaves and layers of dust covered everything,, with faded and peeling wallpaper on each wall…Rectangular shaped patterns of grime hung on the walls where photos or paintings must have been…
Lisa led them thru the various rooms,, always excited about how much of the original woodwork and trim still remained…All Dave could see was how much work had to be done…Melody was enthralled by the character of each room,, in her mind she could see the potential of a great one of a kind home…The kitchen on the first floor was a vintage 1970’s remodel with the cabinets having 3 or 4 coats of off white paint on them,, all the appliances were Avocado green which was the designer choice at that time,, the view towards the back showed an unkempt yard of 150 ft in dept with a rusting swing set tucked away in one corner…A side door opened onto the covered porch and then a rutted gravel path led to the old carriage house…While Lisa and Melody chatted away about the possibilities of the house Dave decided to have one more look around and to look at the third floor loft rooms and the basement…Dave found the doorway that lead to the basement tucked under the grand staircase,, after having pushed the light switch Dave cautiously descended the steep stairs into the basement,, he was careful to avoid the bottom step which was broken…Two bare light bulbs gave just enough illumination so that he could see his way around without bumping into any of the misc furniture and boxes that were stored there…In the middle of the basement stood a gigantic coal fired furnace that had been converted to oil,, the ductwork in places had come apart and were now dangling in midair…There was no hot water heater that he could find,, just some large piping that ran into and out of the furnace…

The walls were made from dressed field stones coated with wire and plaster,, the concrete basement floor was dry but covered in a fine layer of dust,, he could see where he had left his footprints…A lot of work to be done to replace the heating system he thought…He found it strange that there were no cobwebs or dead mice laying around…
After returning to the first floor,, Dave headed to the third floor attic rooms…After climbing the switchback stairs from the second floor he found only one locked door…Dave tried all the keys on the key ring and then tried to force his way in by pushing with his shoulder as he had done on the front door,, but the attic door would not give…Dave could see a shadow moving under the door but he didn’t hear any noises,, he guessed that maybe a raccoon had gotten in thru the hole in the roof…

There was nothing else for him to do but to find Melody and Lisa…Dave found Lisa and Melody chatting in the old drawing room,, discussing the design of the fireplace’s granite surround…
“Have you seen everything?”...he asked Melody...”We should be thinking about heading back home”…
“Yes,, I think so”…
On the way back to Lisa’s Reality office Dave thought himself lucky that it was only a short drive…Melody and Lisa continually talked about the house…It seemed that neither of them stopped to take a breath…He would have a hard time convincing Melody that there was just too much work to be done to fix the house and that it would cost more than they could afford…

Lisa stood by the car,, her head bobbling in and out the window as she excitedly talked to Dave and Melody…
“Now I know that you think that the price is a little high,,
but it is on 6 acres…And just between you and me,, I think the bank wants to get rid of it and would be willing to come down on the price and I know that I can talk the Mayor into giving you a tax abatement plan”…”Now you think about it,, and get back to me real soon,, OK?”...”Talk to you later Melody”…”bye”…”byebye”…
Dave pulled away from the curb and made a sharp u-turn in the street then pulled into the gas station next to Lisa’s Realty office…The old gas pumps were the type that were standard in the 1950’s,, they had round heads with just one hose and rotating dials,, it took a minute for Dave to realize that all it took was for him to lift up the trigger on the handle to start the gas pump…He had hoped that he could use is debit card,, but realized he would have to go inside,, where the old man was…The final total on the machine read $8:50 after he had filled his gas tank…An argument with the old man about the true price was something he hoped he could avoid…

Dave stepped through the doorway into the darkened little gas station,, fluorescent lights cast a dim glow over the room with aisles formed by shelves of automotive products…
Dave could hear the sound of claws clicking on the wooden floor coming quickly towards him…The dog came racing towards Dave on its three good legs then stopped two feet in front of him…Barking and growling,, its teeth gleamed in the dim light…Dave backed up towards the door,, with the dog slowly following as if ready to jump towards Dave’s neck…
The old man came from around the corner of the last row of shelves and just stood there watching the scene,, he pulled a knife from his back pocket and cut a hunk of chewin’ tobacco then placed the tobacco in his mouth…
“Hey mister”…”You want to do something with your dog?”…
“What’s the matter son,, you afraid of dogs?”…
‘Splult’ went a glob of tobacco juice onto the floor…
“Hey,, I just want to pay for my gas”…said Dave as he backed out of the door…”I can pay you later if you want”…
“KING,, shut up”…yelled the old man…
King became quite and laid on the floor,, his eyes were reflective red spheres in the darkness,, he continued to intently watch every movement that Dave made,, just waiting for one mistake…

Dave cautiously made his way back into the gas station,, keeping as wide a distance between himself and King as he could…The dog never moved…The old man stood behind the counter waiting…As Dave’s eyes became accustomed to the darkened room he could see the old man clearer…He was dressed in an old blue work shirt with the name Sam snitched into the front,, the shirt looked as if he had been wearing it for weeks…Oil and grease stains marked the entire front,, his denim jeans were no better,, a chain ran from one of the front belt hoops to a large wallet in his back pocket…The old man’s face was weather beaten and as dark as tanned leather,,
deep scowl lines crossed his face…The only hair Dave could see was black sideburns trailing down from the top of his ears to the bottom of his jaw line…He was missing the last two fingers on his left hand…The old man’s pale blue eyes stared out at Dave from under a Lando style cap that had the ear flaps buttoned at the top…The cap was marked with sweat lines and several oil smeared fingerprints were on the tattered brim…
“Hi uhh Sam,, it says $8:50 on the gas pump,, how much do I owe you?”…
‘Splult’,, “The names Jericho”…
“Sorry your shirt says Sam”,, I thought---“
“Found it”…“If it says $8:50,, then that’s what you owe me”…
“Your sure?...I filled my tank up”…
“Don’t hear so well,, do yea?”…
Not wishing to argue with the old man Dave handed him a ten dollar bill and waited for his change…The old man stuffed the money into his pocket and stood there...‘Splult’…
Dave waited a few moments,, then left,, carefully avoiding King…
“What took you so long?”…asked Melody…
“Nothing”…Dave replied as the tires spun,, throwing gravel into the air…
“Dave!”…
“Don’t ever go in there,, that guy is creepy”…

Sunday morning Dave sat at their small dining room table having coffee while reading the Sunday paper,, it had been a long Saturday so he allowed himself to sleep in until 9:30…
Melody had already been up for a couple of hours,, she was sitting at the computer doing research on the town of Grove City…
“You know---“
“Damn it Dave,, you scared the hell out of me”…
“Sorry hun,, you know what that cat of yours did?”…
“What has she been into now?”…
“I was sitting there reading the paper,, when all of a sudden she jumped up on the table and starts clawing at my paper”…
“I guess she doesn’t like being ignored”…
“I wonder if she’d like to have my foot up her ass”…
“Ha ha,, you know Cleo is a good cat,, most of the time”…
“It’s a hairball…what have you been doing?”…
“I’ve been looking up information on Grove City”…
“Oh boy”…“I think I’ll go back to bed”…
“Now Dave you know we need to talk about this”…
“I have a headache already,, let’s talk about it this afternoon,, OK?”…

The chimes of the small Windsor clock were just finishing their musical serenade as Melody sneaked up on her sleeping husband…
“Wake up,, wake up,, it’s 2 o’clock”…insisted Melody
as she sat down on the couch where Dave had been peacefully sleeping…
“What?”…”Oh no,, not that again”…said Dave half hung over from his dream state…
“Now you know that I’m going to bug you until we discuss this”…Melody said cheerfully…
“Yeah,, I know”…”let me get something to drink”…
Dave returned from the refrigerator with a cold beer for himself and one for Melody,, then sat next to her on the couch with his feet propped up on the coffee table…Melody was armed with an arm load of papers she had printed off of the internet about the town of Grove City…
“OK hit me”…Dave grinned…
“Well,, I couldn’t find out much about Grove city”…”Except the usual stuff,, like when it was incorporated,, the population,, how big it is”…”And all the information was kind of old,, everything seemed to be from the 1980’s”…
“Don’t you think that’s strange?”…
“Well---“
“But I did find out about the college,, and they do offer adult-ed classes,, but only during the school year”…
“Maybe---“
“So I did some research on old houses,, and you know what?”
“Ahh,,---“
“I actually found an old listing for that house,, isn’t that amazing?”…
“Well---“
“It was built in1882 by a Mr. Carlton Cranston,, nobody knows why he built it there,, but he was thought to have been an eccentric inventor who was obsessed with electricity,, you know that house was one of the first ones in the state to have electric lights,, apparently he designed everything himself and had a huge generator built in the basement”…”It didn’t say what happened to him,, rumors where that he was doing time travel experiments and some kind of monster came thru a door that he had created”…”Sounds like the movie we saw last month”…
”Isn’t that hilarious?”…”Ignorant townsfolk with their rumors”…
“Yea well---“
“And his wife,, Kay,, lived there until 1904,, then she disappeared too”…”It’s so funny reading those old documents and how superstitious everybody was”…
“You know”…Dave kept talking not wanting to be interrupted again…”You would make a good attorney,, you don’t let the opposing consul get a word in edgewise”…
“OK smarty,, your turn”…
“They’re asking too much money,, and there are just to many repairs that have to be done,, the plumbing needs replaced,, and the electrical,, you didn’t see the heating system,, I bet it doesn’t even work”…”I can’t do it,, all I know how to do is change the oil in the car,, even then I take it to Quicky-Lube”…
“$425,000 is not too much for a house near Pittsburgh,, especially when it’s on 6 wooded acres”…”I’ll bet they would come down in price,, it has been empty for 6 years”…
“Why don’t you give Lisa a call and give them a lower price”…
“OK,, if it will make you happy I’ll call her tomorrow”…
“You could call her today,, I think the Realty office is her home”…

”No kidding”…
Dave returned to Melody sitting on the couch after having a ten minute phone conversation with Lisa,, he picked up his beer and drank it down in one swallow…
“Well?”…Melody asked excitedly…
“I offered her $145,000,, and she didn’t hang up,, she said
she would talk to the bank and the Mayor then call me at work tomorrow…Dave said with a glazed confused look on his face…

Dave returned home Monday evening from work with an exhausted look on his face,, kicking off his shoes and plopping himself down on the couch…Melody smiling sweetly greeted him with a cold beer …
“Well?”… “Don’t make me wait,, did Lisa call?”…
“Yea,, she called”…”She’s going to send us the paperwork,,
as soon as it’s done”...Dave looked as if a cab had dragged him down Center St…In his mind he could see all the hard work and expenses that laid before him,, his future he thought would be a never ending battle with repairs,, repairs,, repairs…
Melody squealed with delight and gave her husband a kiss…
“Lets go out and celebrate”…said Melody with a joyous giggle…

Two months later Dave stood on the porch of his new home,, waving goodbye to the truck driver of the moving company…Dave wandered into the front yard and looked back at the house…Certainly was big he thought…The hole in the roof had been repaired as had the broken front window,, part of the deal he had made in order to buy the place…Just temporary fixes he knew,, but it was a start…Melody was inside busily unpacking boxes and putting things where she best thought they should go,, the house had been thoroughly cleaned by a professional cleaning crew before the papers were signed,, another of the requirements that Dave had insisted apon…The rest was up to them…Dave took a big breath,, stuffed his hands into his pockets and slowly walked up to the house,, shaking his head…

Dave went down into the basement to see how the heating contractors were doing with the new furnace and water heater…The basement was empty except for a few boxes and Melody’s potters wheel and kiln…
“These old trunk lines aren’t going to last long you know”…said Ed as he greeted Dave…
“Yeah,, I know…it’s on my list”…”Just make sure we have some heat and hot water”…
His ‘list’,, not enough paper in the world to write his list on,, Dave thought to himself…

Dave had his headed poked into the refrigerator looking for a beer when Melody snuck up behind him and gave him a big hug,, she was delighted with their new home…A home of their own,, something that she had always dreamed of…
“I’m glad your so happy”…Dave said as he rubbed the bump on his head…”We’re going to be slaves to this house for the next 30 years”…
“I don’t care,, it’s a beautiful house,, all it needs is some fresh paint”…”And the inspector said that the structure was as solid as the day it was built”…

The next couple of weeks went by without a blink…Dave’s time was split between working as head manager in the New Castle office and meeting or calling repairmen to do work on the house…He was always having to make a quick drive home from work to meet with a contractor…Ten hour work days soon stretched into 12 hour work days…No time for much of anything besides work and the repairs…
On Saturdays he always made a point to be home around noon,, Sundays he tried to sleep in and relax but the chores never waited…Melody occupied her time with getting the yards back into shape or making special lunches and lemonade for the workmen…At night she would go down to the basement and work on her potters wheel after Dave had fallen asleep on the couch…

“Dave the workmen haven’t shown up today”…said Melody over the phone…
“What do you mean?”…”They were there yesterday”…
“The foremen,, John I think his name is,, called and said they weren’t coming back”…
“Yea,, John Cooper,, he’s supposed to be working on the porch and railings”…
“He was yesterday,, but he said he’s not coming back,, I don’t know why”…”Oh,, and Dave,, the house phones aren’t working either,, you’ll have to call me on my cell phone”…
“OK,, I’ll see if I can get a hold of him”…

“Is John Cooper there?”…asked Dave to the lady on the other end of the phone…
“I think so,, can you hold?”…”I think he’s in the garage”…
“Yeah sure”… ”This is John”…came the gravel surfaced voice of John Cooper over the phone…
“John,, this is Dave Lunder,, why aren’t you working at my house?”…
“I’ve been waiting for your call,, I ain’t going back”..
“Why?,, I’m paying you top dollar for your work”…
“My men are scared,, they keep seeing things in the windows,, black shapes that appear from nowhere”…
“And yesterday something chewed off the electric cords on my saws and threw them into the bushes”…”Something ain’t right there”…
“Look,, there’s nothing there,, my wife is there all the time and she hasn’t said anything”… ”Your men must be drunk or taking something”…”It’s just an old house”…
“I run a clean crew,, and I’ll tell you something”…”I seen it too,, moving black shapes out of the corner of my eye”…“I ain’t coming back,, get somebody else”…
“We have a contract,, I’ll sue you for everything you got”..
“Go ahead,, I ain’t got nothing”…said John as he slammed down the receiver…
“Shit”…

The ride home was a weary task for Dave,, the long hours and the endless dealing with the contractors were taking their toll on him,, he found that he had little patience for the little things that go wrong…His sniping at his employees at work was becoming harsher and harsher,, he was even starting to get angry at Melody…On the drive home Dave decided he needed to take some time off,, a week at home would do him some good…He also made the decision to stop all repair work on the house until next spring,, except for the roofing repairs…Fall was in the air and soon Winter would be casting its white shadows over everything…It was time he thought,, to take a break and not have to worry about so much happening at the same time…

“Knock,, knock,, knock”…came the sound of someone at the front door late Saturday afternoon…Melody stopped her work of steaming off the old wall paper near the staircase and
opened the front door…On the porch stood two young boys maybe 6 or 7 years old,, their bicycles laid in the front yard…
“Hi,, what can I do for you?”…asked Melody sweetly…
“My mommy said we could come over here and ask you”…
“Who’s your mommy dear?”…
“My mommy is Lisa,, she sold you this house”…said the little boy as he scratched his head of black hair…
“I didn’t know Lisa had a son”…replied Melody,,
“What do you want to ask me?”…
“I’m Timmy and this is Josh,, the school is having a can drive---”…
“And we would like to have your cans”…piped up Josh…
“Oh,, that sounds good,, you can have our cans”…”But I have to get them ready for you”…”Can you come back next week?”…
“Sure thing lady,, we’ll be back later”…said the boys excitedly as if they had just won a prize…
Melody watched the two young boys get on their bikes and scoot off onto the gravel driveway,, pedaling as fast as they could towards town…The longing for kids of her own crept over her…

Later that evening Melody was sitting at her worktable in the basement,, putting glazes on some of the greenware plates she had made a couple of days before…The headphones from her Ipod blaring out the tunes of Green Day,, her favorite group,, Dave was sitting on the couch watching a preseason football game,, ready to fall asleep…
A white shimmering image of a door started to fade in and out of existence on the wall behind Melody,, finally taking solid form,, it opened quietly,, exposing the sheer blackness beyond…
“Waaa,, waaa”…softly came from the blackness…
“Waaa,,, waaa…Melody”…the voice a little louder…
“Melody…Melody”…
Melody took off her headphones thinking that Dave was calling her…She listened for a moment than returned to her glazing…
“Meow,, meow”…Cleo jumped up onto the worktable,, causing a plate to crash to the floor and knocking over a bottle of glazing…Melody jumped up from her chair in surprise…
“Cleo,, you damn cat”…”You scared me half to death”…
“Get out of here”…smacking the cat on its rear…
Cleo jumped down and watched as the door closed disappeared into the wall…
Melody cleaned up the mess on her potters table and the broken pieces of plate on the floor,, then went upstairs to change out of the clothes that had gotten glazing on them…
“Honey what’s the matter?”…yelled Dave when he heard Melody stomping up the stairs…
“Oh,, nothing”…”Cleo just made a mess of things downstairs and I have to change”…”She scared me to death”…replied Melody from the stair landing…
“Ha ha ha,, I told you that cat was a menace”…

“Meow meow sissth sissth”…came the sound of Cleo as she chased a mouse in the basement,, one of only a few that she had found…Cleo caught the mouse and quickly bit its head off then carried it to the middle of the basement floor,, where she laid down with the mouse between her paws…
A black serpentine tentacle came from under the white door that had reappeared in the basement wall…It silently squirmed along the floor and raised itself high above Cleo…
Cleo was joyfully licking the dead mouse between its paws…
“Wewewerwe”…Cleo screamed as the tentacle grabbed her,, and coiled around her,, lifting her into the air …The white door opened and the black tentacle retreated into the blackness with Cleo in its grasp…The door once again faded into the wall…The light bulbs flickered as the remains of the mouse melted into the floor leaving no trace of hair or blood…Then silence returned to the basement…

Melody came down from the master bedroom late Monday morning dressed in her robe and sat at the small table in the kitchen,, placing her head in her hands,, a dejected frown on her face…
“What’s the matter hun?”…asked Dave as he came from the parlor where he had been removing wallpaper,, the portable steamer still in his hand…
“I’m tired of removing wallpaper,, I need a break”…
“Lets go into town and look around”…”Lets take the whole day off”…replied Melody glumly…
“That’s OK with me,, but I only have this week off to help you”…”Lets get dressed and look the town over,, and maybe have some lunch,, we need to get out and meet some of the townsfolk”…

The day was a cool fall day but the brilliant sunshine helped to warm Dave and Melody as they walked along Grove City’s main street,, looking into the various stores…It was a little past noon when they walked into the ‘Mill’ a little café on the corner…A little bell chimed announcing their entering…Almost in unison everyone in the little café became silent and turned their heads to watch Dave and Melody as they sat down at the old fashioned marble counter…
“What can I get you folks?”…asked Martin Reinhand,, the owner of the café…
“How about some lunch”…replied Dave…
“Sure we can do that”…said Martin as he placed two glasses of water in front of them…”Let me get you a couple of menus”…
Dave looked around at the small crowd that was there,, he didn’t recognize anyone…They all sat in their chairs speaking in muffled tones…
Dave ate his hamburger and fries while Melody nibbled on her salad,, occasionally stealing a fry from Dave’s plate…It was one of the best hamburgers that Dave had had recently…
The wind had picked up slightly as Dave and Melody left the café bringing a sudden chill to the air…They decided to finish their stroll down main street and then return home to
relax for the remainder of the day…

“Oh my,, oh my…excuse me”…Lisa exclaimed as she emerged from the hardware store bumping into Melody…Her son Timmy following her…
“Hi Lisa”…remarked Melody…
“Oh hi,, you two”…”How do you like your new house?”…
“Oh,, we like it a lot,, but there is so much to do”…”We thought we would take a break and come into town”…
“Well that’s nice,, that’s nice”…”You know that’s a very special house around here”…
Melody paused for a moment and looked at Timmy…
“Is this Timmy?”…”Your so much taller”…
Timmy had grown at least 2 feet taller since the last time Melody had seen him…
“Oh my yes,, he’s just growing like a weed”…
“No school today?”…asked Dave
“Ohh,, ohh ..Timmy had a dentist appointment today so he didn’t go”…”Well we must be going,, got to go”…
Lisa and Timmy scurried down the sidewalk away from anymore questions from Dave and Melody…
“That woman gets stranger every time we meet”…said Dave…

“Did you notice anything weird when we were having lunch at the café?”…Dave asked Melody after they got back home…
“No not really,, just that I don’t think we’re going to make many friends around here”…
“No it’s not that,, it’s just that everyone in that café had black hair”…
“Yeah now that you mention it I did notice that”…”I thought we had walked into a Chinese restaurant at first”…
“Why do you think that is?”…
“I don’t know,, must be genetics”…”I’m going to take a shower and lay down for awhile”…replied Melody…
“OK,, hun…I’ll be up later to play”…
“Well don’t wait to long,, I might be asleep”…

Dave sat on the couch flipping thru the 4 channels on the TV,, looking for something,, anything to watch…His eyes starting to close with his chin falling onto his chest until he dozed off…Melody finished her shower and laid on the bed wrapped only in a towel,, half asleep as she waited hopefully for Dave to join her…
The door to the basement opened and a black tentacle snaked across the floor,, it crept into the parlor where Dave was peacefully snoring then lifted itself high over Dave’s head… ”Dave are you coming?”…
The black shape hearing Melody’s voice stopped and slithered back towards the stairs,, climbing them until it was at the top...It went down the hallway and rising itself up looked into the room were Melody was laying…It creped forward and hovered near the bed,, then collapsed onto the floor forming a throbbing black mound …A few moments later a humanoid form rose from the floor…The figure was a shiny black color and quivered when it moved,, quietly it moved towards Melody,, then it slowly undid the towel that covered Melody’s back…It paused for a moment then began to caress her back…
“Hmmm,, that feels good”…murmured Melody…
The figures hands continued to caress Melody’s back,, rubbing her shoulders and sliding down farther on her body,, then it spread her legs…
“Hmmm”… moaned Melody just before she fell asleep…

Melody dressed in her bathrobe gave Dave a big kiss when she found him in the kitchen…
“What was that for?”…
“For the backrub,, silly”…”It was your best one yet”…
“Backrub?”…”I just woke up and came in here to make myself something to eat while you were sleeping”…
“You didn’t---I guess I was just dreaming”…
“Better than mine huh?”…
“Hmmm yes”…
“I guess I’ll have to improve my technique,, later tonight”…replied Dave as he kissed his wife on the forehead…
“Want some dinner?”…”I think we have some ribs”…
“I’m starved”…

Melody stood over a load of dishes in the sink after dinner while Dave sat at the small table drinking coffee…
“Dave,, Dave,, come here quick,, there’s somebody in the woods”…Melody exclaimed as she looked out the kitchen window…
“Where?”…said Dave as he leaned over the counter…
“Those lights”…”See them?”…
“Must be some kids fooling around in the woods”…”I’ll go have a look”…”You stay here”…
Dave put on his windbreaker and headed out the side door…
“Dave!!!...take your shotgun”…Melody half-whispered…
“It’s just some kids”…
As soon as Dave had left Melody turned off the kitchen lights and watched anxiously through the windows,, clutching her bathrobe tightly to her neck…

Dave steadily walked closer and closer to where the lights were,, expecting to find a group of kids having a beer party…
The lights were dimmer than flashlights and seemed to dance through the air…As he got nearer he could hear chanting and murmuring from a group of figures all dressed in full-length grey cloaks,, their heads covered by the hoods…He crept closer to watch,, being as careful as he could not to snap any branches underfoot as he walked…Near a large clump of bushes he crouched down to watch…
“Malgalo,, malgalo,, huito,, hurtowaaa”…the group chanted…Dave’s heart was pounding in his throat as he watched the group of figures dance in a circle around a stone that was half buried in the ground,, each figure carried a candle that flickered in the night air…He couldn’t make out any of the figures faces as he watched the ceremony…From behind him he heard the snapping of branches…Two figures in grey robes where approaching…He squeezed himself deeper into the bushes and as low to the ground as he could…
“When do you think it will happen?”…a male said,, a voice that Dave did not recognize…
“Can’t be long now,, it’s been months”…replied a females voice…
“Hurry,, we’re late”…
The two figures continued towards the group,, passing just yards from where he was hidden…Dave let out his breath and breathed easier,, he continued to watch for another 10 minutes then crept back to his house…

“Well,, what was it?”…whispered Melody to Dave as he stood in the kitchen taking off his coat…”You took so long I was frightened”…
“I don’t know what it was,, some crazy people all dressed up in medieval cloaks,, all dancing around some stone”…
“Who were they?”…”Where did they come from?”…
“I don’t know,, I couldn’t see their faces”…
Dave grabbed a beer from the refrigerator and took a large swallow,, his hands were still shaking…
“What are we going to do?”…
“Is this the first time that you have seen them?”…
“Of course it is”…
“Tomorrow I’m going to go over there and see if I can find anything”…”Next time I’m going to call the cops”…
“I’ll go with you”…
“Lets just make sure the doors are locked tonight”…

Around noon the next day Dave and Melody stopped their work on the house and headed over into the woods where Dave had seen the group of figures the night before…He brought along his loaded shotgun just in case they found anyone there…
“This is where they were alright”…”Look at the grass it’s all been trampled down”…”And look a couple of candles”…said Dave…
“Is this the stone they were dancing around?”…
“Yeah,, that’s it”…
Melody bent down to have a closer look at the stone,, she began to pull away some of the weeds around the base to get a better view…
“Dave look,, it’s a grave stone”…
“What?”…
Melody dug the soft back dirt away from the tombstone so she could read the name craved into the face…
“It’s the grave of Carlton Cranston”…”Born 1832,, died 1884”…
“Isn’t he the guy that built our house?”…
“That’s right”…
“I thought you said he disappeared”…
“Guess not,, here’s his grave”…
“I’m going to look around and see if I can find anything else”…
Dave wandered into the nearby grass,, he could see trails where the grass had been stepped on leading towards the main road…
“Melody come here”…Dave yelled
Melody stood behind Dave looking at the gravestones he had found…48 graves in what appeared to be 3 rows,, all of them leaning over in some manner,, a few had cracked and fallen to the ground…
“Dave they all have the same date of death”…”1884,, the same as on Cranston’s grave”…
“Maybe there was an epidemic or something”…replied Dave
“I wonder why Cranston’s is way over there”…
“Lets get out of here”…said Melody…”this place is giving me the creeps”…

Dave and Melody sat in the parlor,, each of them sipping on a warm cup of coffee,, discussing the events of the past few days and what to do,, what did it all mean…They decided just to be more cautious about leaving the doors unlocked and would call the police if they saw anyone on their property again…

A week later Melody began to have nausea,, and severe headaches in the morning,, she would wake up early and sit by the toilet with her head over the seat ready incase she started vomiting again…She had these symptoms before when she was pregnant with their first child…
“Are you feeling alright hun?”…”You look worn out”…asked Dave one morning during breakfast…
“I think I may be pregnant again”…groaned Melody…
Dave wrapped his arms around his wife and gently kissed her…”That’s wonderful”…
“Get away from me,, you did this”…Melody replied as she dashed off to the bathroom…

Dave’s work load began to increase at his office with him working 12 hours a day most weeks…He rarely got a chance to see Melody,, she seemed to be always sleeping,, and her mood changed to more sullen and quarrelsome…Dave noticed that she was getting much bigger than she had the last time,, and it seemed to be happening much quicker…
“Hun,, when was the last time you saw your doctor?”…
“What do you care?”…”I saw him just last week”…retorted Melody…
“What did he say?”…
“He said,, if you must know,, that everything appeared normal”…”That I was just retaining water,, and he gave me a prescription for some vitamins”…

The first light snowfall of the winter had fallen during the night when Melody screamed and woke Dave up…
“Dave,, it kicked me”…”It hurts”…
“That’s not possible is it?”…”It’s too early”…
“IT MOVED!!”…”I think I should know”…
“Take it easy”…Dave said trying to calm his wife…He put his hand on her stomach and caressed it gently,, then he left it kick also…
“Your right”…”I just felt it”…”I’ll take you to the doctor,, and let him look at you”…
The trip to the doctors office the next day did little to dispel
the worries of Dave and Melody…The ultrasounds were inconclusive and suggested that she might be carrying twins…He just prescribed more rest,, and better eating habits…

On the 2nd Saturday in December Dave and Melody sat at the kitchen table watching the snow fall…
“Boom”…came the sound of a shotgun blast near by…
“Boom”…
Dave rushed to the front parlor and looked out the window,, there standing in the freshly fallen snow were figures in grey cloaks…Dave grabbed his shotgun and stepped out onto the
porch to confront them,, Melody hid behind the front door,, peering out through the small inset window…Dave recognized some of them…Jericho,, the gas station owner was there with his shotgun trailing smoke from the barrel,, and Martin Reinhand,, the owner of the ‘Mill’ café,, as was Lisa with her son Timmy…
“Put down that pee shooter son”…demanded Jericho…“Or I’ll blow your head clean off”…
“What do you people want?”…replied Dave…
“Boom”… Jericho shot over the head of Dave…“The gun sonny”…
Dave complied with Jericho’s demands and threw his shotgun to the side…
“Melody,, Melody”…said Lisa…
“What do you want?”…yelled Dave
“We want to see Melody”…Lisa replied…
“Move over there boy”…and kept your mouth shut”…Jericho commanded as he gestured with his shotgun…

”Melody,, come out here dear,, we wouldn’t hurt you”…
Melody timidly stepped from behind the door and walked
down the porch steps,, standing only a few feet from Dave…Her face pale and full of fear,, she started to sob…
The front door behind them opened and two glistening black tentacles emerged,, they stretched out and hovered above Dave and Melody…The tentacles quickly seized Dave and Melody wrapping itself around them…
“aggggghh”…Melody screamed as Dave was hoisted into the air and then pulled back into the house…
The townsfolk lined up in a semi-circle with their heads back and their mouths wide open,, their eyes rolled exposing only the whites of their eyes,, they stood there with their arms tightly to their bodies and the palms of their hands facing upwards…
“Malgalo,, malgalo,, huito,, hurtowaaa”…emanated from their open mouths…
Melody was hanging in the air in the grasp of the black tentacle…As it squeezed her tighter,, her water broke and she was dropped into the snow…Melody laid there in pain,, screaming as loud as she could…The black tentacle narrowed in size and entered her mouth…Lisa stepped forward and spread Melody’s legs apart and removed her underwear…

Soon a baby’s head appeared,, as it emerged Lisa grabbed it and bit off the umbilical cord…Then raised the black haired boy high above her head…Melody’s body was dragged back over the ground and up towards the house,, her neck was broken as she bounced over the porch steps,, the tentacle dragged her into the house,, and the front door slammed shut…
Lisa held the baby high for all to see…
“This is my new son,, the God has given him to us so that our family will grow”…”He shall be called Steven”…


Mark and Julie stood in the front yard looking at the old house…
“It’s the oldest house in town”…“It’s not much to look at from the outside,, it needs a little repair work…But the inside is still in wonderful condition,, with all the original woodwork…Its barely been changed on the inside from when it was first built…Like I said it needs some work but it used to be the grandest house in town”…” You can see that some repairs have already been started”…”A young couple was restoring it,, but they got transferred to Seattle”…
“Lets go inside”…”Here Mark you better open the front door,, sometimes it sticks”…Lisa said enthusiastically while her son Steven walked beside her………….